Love Games
by FlabbergastedPancakes
Summary: Edward and Jonathan meet an alluring, but deranged and peculiar female rogue in Arkham Asylum, and they engage in a battle to see who can win her heart first! Riddler x OC, with some Scarecrow mixed up in there. It's rated T for the occasional language, but I'll probably end up switching the rating to M for some smut I have planned out for the future.
1. The Queen of Chaos

He burst through the double doors, and took in the fresh new sight of the room surrounding him.

"Okay, **Nigma**. Due to your good behavior, you've gotten one hour of 'Games and Recreation' added to your schedule. Make it count, and don't screw it up."

_"Yeah, yeah." _He thought as he rolled his eyes. He hated his guards.

As soon as his two guards left him, he made his way to the other side of the room, where the chess tables were. He approached the young woman he had eyed since his incarceration, and asked said this: "Riddle me this! What walks on four legs, then two legs, and then finally three legs?"

She leaned back into her chair, circling her finger around her lips. She speculated for a moment, and came up with her answer.

"A human being." The disheveled woman said with a grin. "As infants, we usually crawl on all fours. As we mature, we learn to walk on our two feet. And, in our old age, we become weak and frail, requiring the need of a cane." She was incredibly proud of her answer.

"Ha ha ha! An excellent try, but, the answer to all three is a baby." The smirk on his face became more prominent. Her face fell a little, but she still kept a smile.

"Please, do tell me how?" She asked him.

"Well, you were right at first, as babies we do crawl on all fours. However, if you hack off its two legs, you can watch it squirm around in pain. Give it a crutch, and it will hobble around as it tries to crawl, you see?"

She sat there in her chair, processing what he had just said. Despite the smile on her face, her expression was still so... blank. Her body language was sending off conflicting signals. Edward didn't know what she was thinking about, or if his joke had succeeded. But then, he heard a loud and clumsy laughter.

"Oh my! That was great!" she cried as her cackling calmed down. He extended his hand out towards her.

"**Edward Nigma.** Formally know as Gotham's Crown Prince of Conundrums! The Prince of Puzzles! The **Riddler**." he announced to her proudly.

"**Charlotte White**. Formally known as Gotham's Queen of Chaos, confusion, and calamity, Eris." She says, reaching over and clumsily shaking his hand.

"Ah, I'm a big fan of the eccentric ways you try to bring anarchy about Gotham."

"Thank you. I'm a big fan of the way you construct your death traps and ensnare victims to perplex the Bat with."

His smirk turned into a wide grin, and they smiled at each other.

"Would you mind if I sat here with a beautiful woman such as yourself?" the redheaded man asked the strawberry blonde woman, as he slithered into the chair opposite of her.

"Actually," she said, pushing her chair away from the table a bit, "I was just about to go find another game to occupy my time with..."

"What kind of game?"

She leaned in slightly, lowered her voice a bit, stared him in the eyes, and said softly with a smile "... Whatever kind of game you'd like to play, Mister Nigma..."

He leaned in, lowered his voice, locked his eyes with hers, and with his smirk replies "Is that supposed to have some sort of hidden meaning?"

"Well..." she leaned in more, "...I like to think that everything has a hidden meaning."

He leaned in more. "My thoughts exactly."

"So..." she continued to inch in, and said "...What kind of games are we to play, Mister Nigma...?"

"Whatever your heart desires, Charlotte..."

At this point, their faces were mere inches apart. Their eye contact was unbreakable, with his blue and her green eyes staring deep into each others. She was grinning wildly, and the smirk on his face was ear to ear.

"Ha ha ha!" She laughed. She backed out from the table, she stood up, and she started wandering off towards the games.

That confused Edward, and he didn't like how she left him there,** alone**. So, he got up as well, and followed the odd woman.

"What game would you like to play? They have board games and card games. Also, there are video games, but an inmate's using the Wii at the moment, and since has a few screws loose, we definitely don't want to bother him." She said with her soft smile.

Her sudden invitation perplexed Edward, especially after she ditched him at the chess table. He scanned her from head to toe. Arms crossed, and a rigid posture. Signs of defense. But, she was holding eye contact and smiling, on an otherwise blank face. Signs of invitation, perhaps? Her body language was conflicting. Still, he couldn't get a read on her.

"Well... what of a game of wits?"

"A game of wits? They have Risk, Scrabble, and Clue, although I think there are some missing pieces to that..." she said as she opened up the box for Clue, and started digging for the pieces.

"No. I meant as in Riddles and wordplay." He assured.

"Oh? How interesting!" she cheered happily as she dropped the box, and hopped on over to a different table. She pulled up an extra chair across from her, and said "Here. You can sit here!" before sitting down in her own chair. "The Prince of Puzzles wants to have a battle of wits with me, how flattering." She grinned. "I'll let you go first, since you're the master."

He grinned out of amusement. He sat down in his chair, and says "Riddle me this! I never was, am always to be. No one ever saw me, nor ever will. And yet I am the confidence of all, To live and breathe on this terrestrial ball. What am I?"

"... The future." She replied instantly. They smile at each other. "What always runs but never walks, often murmurs, never talks, has a bed but never sleeps, has a mouth but never eats?"

"Well, that's easy. A river. Riddle me this, what has a head, a tail, is brown, and has no legs?"

"Ha! A penny!"

"Oh, you're fast." He said with a slight wink.

"You're not to shabby yourself, Mister Nigma." She winked back. "I am always hungry, I must always be fed. The finger I touch, will soon turn red."  
"Fire. Riddle me this, I have four legs but no tail. Usually I am heard only at night. What am I?"

"A frog. I was hoping the King of Conundrums would be more challenging, Mister Nigma." she said, inviting him to challenge her more. "I know a word of letters three. Add two, and fewer there will be."

"Few." he answered. "And if you really want a harder one..." he flashed her an arrogant smirk. "Whoever makes it, tells it not. Whoever takes it, knows it not. And whoever knows it, wants it not."

"Hmm..." she really had to think about this one for a moment. "... is it... poison?"  
"Nope! The answer was counterfeit money."

"Good one." she says. "I am, in truth, a yellow fork, from tables in the sky, by inadvertent fingers dropped. The awful mansions never quite disclosed, and never quite concealed, the apparatus of the dark, to ignorance revealed. What am I?"

"A pit of poetry, I see. A fan of Emily Dickinson, are we?" She smiles at him happily. "The answer, however, is lightning."

"Yes! She's been one of my favorite authors since I was but a small child..." she recounted, with a slight gleam of happiness I her eyes.  
"However... That was obviously a very long time ago..." She said, losing the gleam.

"You're a young lady, though. How old are you? My guess would be in the early twenties." He asked, trying to gather information about her.  
"Ha ha! You try to flatter me too much. I don't know you well enough to give you my actual age yet. Sorry, Mister Nigma."

"No worries, Charlotte..." he said, disappointed. "Riddle me this, I am the beginning of the end, and the end of time and space. I am essential to creation, and I surround every place. What am I?"

"... The letter E..."

For the rest of their duration, Edward and Charlotte exchanged riddles and smirks with each other. She looked over at the clock, and saw that her time there was ending, and it was ending soon.

"If you break me, I do not stop working, if you touch me, I may be snared, and if you lose me... Nothing will matter." She quickly spat out.

Edward became perplexed. He knew the answer, and it definitely flattered his ego, but he wasn't completely sure of her motives. He had a good idea, but still wasn't completely sure. And it was driving him **nuts**.

"Your-"

Right as he began to answer, two big burly guards marched into the room, and approached Charlotte.

"All right, Charlotte, your time is up. Kiss your new boyfriend goodbye, it's time for you to leave." One of them commanded her.

"Oh, Bob!" She exclaimed with a smile as she got up, "Always teasing me." she said, dodging his comment.

"I thought we still had 15 minutes left?" Edward asked.

"Yes. Well, you might. I came in 15 minutes earlier than you." She explained.

"So, we have different schedules then, I'm guessing."

"Exactly! You're a smart man, Mister Nigma!"

"You gonna kiss him goodbye already, or what?" the other guard said, the both of them growing impatient.  
"Just give me a minute, Billy!" she whined.  
She then turned to Edward, leaned in, and whispered in his ear softly "See you soon, Mister Nigma..."  
"WHOA!" her guard, Billy, yelled as he yanked her away from Edward. "You know the rules, Charlotte! You are **not** allowed to be that close to another inmate, let alone somebody of the opposite sex."  
She rolled her eyes at him, and stuck out her two wrists, allowing the guards to cuff her for transport to her next destination.  
"You've been really good lately, so I'm gonna let you off easy, but do it again, and I'll have to write it down in my next report and you will be penalized..." The guards voice trailed off as the three of them left the room, leaving Edward alone at the table, thinking about the answer. "_Your heart."  
_

* * *

**_A/N: First chapter! Tell me what you thought about it in the reviews, please! It would be greatly appreciated. _**

**_A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~_**


	2. Riot!

**_This chapter is a bit different than from the last one, it deals more with philosophical debates and such, so I hope you don't mind a healthy dosage of debates every now and then.  
_**

* * *

When he returned to the room the next day, he saw her in the same place. She was sitting at the chess table, alone in the room filled with inmates.

"Hello. May I sit here?" Edward said, pulling up the chair next to her.

"Of course! I've no problems with that." Charlotte said, smiling at him.

"I have a couple of questions that I'd like you to answer for me." He smirks.

"But what if I don't want to answer your questions, Mister Nigma?" She smirked back.

"Well, why wouldn't you want to answer? What have you to hide?"

"A lot of things. Things that aren't really your business."

"How can I make it my business?"

"How about we play a game, Mister Nigma? I hear you like games, so let's play one."

"Okay..." he said, trying to figure out what her aim was now. "What game would you like to play?"

"You yourself seem like an interesting man. And it's obvious you think that I'm an interesting woman. So, lets play a game. Here's the game. You ask me a question, and I get to ask you a question. This way, we both satisfy our desires."

"And if I refuse?" he asked.

"Then I refuse to answer anything you ask about me. You see how that works?"

"You drive a hard bargain. How will I know you're telling the truth? You're known to hold deceiving deals."

"And you're known for being deceiving as well. We'll both be taking risks with this game. But that's what makes it so entertaining, I think."

He held his smirk, but she could tell he was still unsure of their deal.

"I give you my word that I'll always give a truthful answer, seeing as you always hold a code of telling the truth, if that will ease your nerves a bit." She says as she held out her hand for him to shake.

"... Alright, let's play." He shook on it.

"Yes! Okay, I'll let you go first, Mister Nigma."

"How's your sex life?" His smirk grew.

"Ha ha ha! Interested in my sex life, hmm? I wonder why that is?" She grinned. "My sex life, it's pretty boring. Sex usually isn't of interest to me."

He raised his brow at her in interest.

"Why the interest in my sex life, Mister Nigma?"

"You're a beautiful woman. Probably one of the most beautiful out of the rouges. And, most of the other women exploit themselves sexually, whereas you typically don't. And I just thought that men might be interested in you... sexually."

"Just because I don't have sex doesn't mean that people aren't interested in having sex with me." She smiled.

"How is your relationship with your parents?"

"Great! I haven't heard from them in years."

"Most people would see that as a bad thing. Trouble with your parents, perhaps?"

"You could say that." She said. "I get two questions now since you asked two last time. How was your childhood?"

"I hated it." He sneered.

"Why?"

"My father was abusive."

"I see..." She looked down at the ground with a slightly sad look in her eyes.

"So, why haven't you talked to your parents lately?"

"My mother ran away with her lover in my late teens and I haven't heard from her since. And as for my father, well, he's been busy overseas."

That seemed to interest Edward even more. _"A neglectful mother and a workaholic father, maybe?"_ he thought.

"What did you like to do with friends as a child?" She asked him.

"I didn't have very many friends growing up, but I obviously enjoyed puzzles and riddles as a child. So your mother ran away. What was your mother like?"

"She wasn't necessarily mean or abusive when you were on her good side, but she was very neglectful. She didn't want to spend time with her children. She didn't enjoy it." She said as she shrugged indifferently. "What was **your **mother like, Mister Nigma?"

He wasn't really enjoying these questions, but he **loved **the information he was getting out of her.

"Similar, I suppose. She wasn't abusive either, however, she always turned a blind eye to my father's abuse, and was also neglectful emotionally. What was your father like?"

"My father..." she said, with a slight smile and happy gleam in her eyes. "Although he was absent on and off during my childhood, he..."

Out of nowhere, a tall, muscular woman with short, raven hair approached them and stared Edward down with a menacing glare.

"... wasn't that bad of a dad. Did a lot of stupid things, but I was his only child, so understandable, I suppose."

The woman continued to stare down Edward, attempting to intimidate him, but Charlotte remained unusually calm and was trying to carry on the conversation. For Charlotte, it was as if the woman wasn't even there.

"Is this man bothering you, Lettie?" The woman asked Charlotte in a serious voice, as she held eye contact with Edward.

"We're just fine." Charlotte assured her. "Let me introduce you two." She said with her smile.

"_J__ust as I was finally getting somewhere._" Edward thought.

"Edward, this is my best friend, my cellmate, and my partner in crime, Keiko. Formally known as Riot." Charlotte explained.

"And this is the man you were talking about earlier?" Keiko asked Charlotte.

"Yes, Koko, this is Edward."

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Edward said, extending his hand out for Keiko to shake.

Keiko just stood there, staring him down. She grabbed a seat, and sat down with them.

"Koko and I go way back, don't we?" Charlotte said, nudging Keiko with her elbow.

"Yes. Lettie and I have known each other for a long time." Keiko's face was still expressionless.

"Oh? For how long?" Edward asked.

"18 years." Keiko said.

"Has it really been that long?" Charlotte said, spacing out.

"Yes."

"Hmm..."

"Does this mean we can't continue our little game?" Edward asked Charlotte.

"Perhaps another time. However, Koko here will answer nearly everything you ask her!"

"So," Edward turned to Keiko, and asked "What were Lettie's parents really like?"

"Her mother was a drug addict and her father was a drunk."

Charlotte's face fell a little.

"Ha ha ha! Oh, Kimiko, always straight to the point... Never beating around the bush." Charlotte said. "Koko, please don't give out too much information about me, okay?"

"Okay."

"How did you two meet?" Edward asked.

"When I was moved into the Advanced Class for Creative Children, I was assigned to work with Lettie for my first project, and we just sort of hit it off, I guess."

"Advanced Class for Creative Children? That sounds fun." He said, smirking at the two of them. "I assume it's a-"

"Class for genius children." Keiko interrupted.

"I see. That was my guess. What sort of work would the two of you do in there? How was it different from your average class?"

"Well, when we met we were both in the sixth grade. Whereas most 'smart' 11 and 12 year olds would be doing simple multiplication and division or effortless earth science, we were doing trigonometry and high school biology." Keiko explained.

"How... interesting." He said, grinning at Charlotte. "You were part of a genius program, were you? What was your favorite subject?"

"I personally loved the advanced engineering elective that I took in high school. But, quantum mechanics and thought experiments were interesting as well."

"Thought experiments? Which is your favorite?"

"Although I love the famous Schrödinger's Cat, 'The Ship of Theseus' is my favorite, since it also explorers philosophy and because of it's applicability to different scenarios." Charlotte answered.

"That sounds familiar. Which one was it again?" Keiko asked.

"It's an ancient thought experiment that explorers the paradox known as the Ship of Theseus. You see, there was this ship that had remained seaworthy for hundreds of years, but only because of the constant repairs and replacements that the crew performed on the ship. If a board rotted, they immediately replaced it with a new one, if their wheel cracked, then they installed a new one, and so on and so forth until every part, every inch of the ship had been replaced and was no longer original to the ship. So, the question is, if every part has been replaced and nothing is no longer original, is it really the same ship, or is it a completely new one? And, if it did eventually become a new ship, at what point did it lose itself?"

"..." Keiko remained silent, thinking about it.  
"... Philosopher Thomas Hobbes took it even further, and asked: 'If one were to take all the old parts removed from the Ship of Theseus and build a new ship from them, then which of the two vessels is the real Ship of Theseus?'"

"Well, that sounds a bit ridiculous." Keiko said.

"I know it sounds a bit ridiculous at first, but I got to thinking about it, and saw it this way: If you took a bike and ended up putting it in the same scenario as the boat, where you keep on replacing everything both new and original to the bike, is it really the same bike? And at what point did that bike lose it's originality?" Charlotte reasoned.

"I see. But what's even the point of these questions?" Keiko asked.

"My guess," Edward said, "is that it's used as means of exploring the nature of identity. And specifically speaking, the question of whether the sum of parts are worth more than the object they build up."

"**Exactly**." Charlotte agreed.

"And how is it applicable to life? What the hell does a bike or a ship have to do with my life?" Keiko asked.

"It's applicable to a lot of things." Edward said.

"Take for example the human body." Charlotte said. "It's constantly regenerating and rebuilding cells. Even our skeletons replace themselves every 8 to 10 years. And to add to that, the cell regeneration is not 100% identical. So, if our bodies are constantly rebuilding themselves-"

"-Then how many versions of us have we lived through? How many 'replacement parts' are we living with right now?" Edward finished her sentence.

"And how many versions of ourselves are we living with right now? You see?" Charlotte added.

"The cells in our hearts and eyes never die out, but these are all still very interesting questions." Edward assured.

"That is true." Charlotte agreed. "But some of the questions still stand, nevertheless."

"Interesting." Keiko said.

Two big guards came up to the table, and presented a pair of handcuffs for Charlotte.

"You know the drill, Charlotte." Her guard, William, told her.

"Ah, it's time for me to go see my shrink." Charlotte said, sticking her wrists in front of her, allowing her guards to put on the cuffs.

"Ouch! Billy, this one's really tight." She said, lifting up her right hand.

"So you're into that kind of stuff?" Edward smirked.

"Yeah, I **love **it when it's kinky." She grinned back.

"Oh, quit it you two!" William said. "And I have orders to tighten your cuffs due to you having a history of escaping from them. You brought it upon yourself, so suck it up."

"Say your goodbyes, Charlotte." Her guard, Robert, told her.

A very serious look crept on her face. She turned to Keiko, and rested one of her hands on her shoulder.

"Keiko... You were like a sister to me. You were always there for me in my times of need and I want to thank you for that. I only wish I was a better friend to you." Charlotte choked out, weepy eyed. "Please... feed my rabbits some nice apples and grapes for me, okay? And **please **give Erwen my love when you break out of here and get home."

"... Okay." Keiko said, completely ignoring her antics.

"And Edward, my sweet, dear Edward- **EH**?!" She was pulled to the ground.

"Cut it out! You do this nearly every time Robert tells you that and it's starting to piss me off!" William told her, after he had yanked her down to the ground, with the two guards beginning to drag her out.

"No! You can't come between our **love**!" She exclaimed as they dragged her out of the room. "Goodbye, my darling! I'll never forget you!"

"Shut up!" Robert told her again.

"Just let her be, she'll shut up if you stop talking to..." Their voices trailed off as they left the room.

"So, she does that often?" Edward asked Keiko.

"You have **no** idea." Keiko answered.

"... Who's Erwen?"

"One of our roommates back home. She's been friends with us for years."  
"I see... So, no romance there, I assume."

"Calm down, she isn't sleeping with anybody currently."

Edward didn't like her comment.

"What's with your sudden abhorrence?"

"I've seen men like you come into her life before. She rarely dates anybody, but I can tell that you like her, and she seems to have some form of interest in you."

"... Your point?"

"I can tell when a man is going to go after Charlotte. She doesn't usually pursue actual romantic endeavors, but if by some mystical and rare chance she does date you... I will **not **forgive you if you do something to hurt that poor, sweet girl."

"I'd be careful if I were you. You're turning this into a personal challenge."

She got up out of her seat, and says "It was nice to meet you, 'Mister Nigma.' You've been warned..."

She wandered off, leaving him alone.

_"This is going to be more fun than I thought." _He thought to himself.

* * *

_**A/N: Just in case you guys got confused with the names of Charlotte's guards, one is named William, and the other is Robert. Billy is a common nickname for William, and Bob is a common nickname for Robert. Just thought I'd point that out to avoid confusion with the last chapter.**_

_**Reviewing would be greatly appreciated. **_

_**A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~**_


	3. The Mess Hall

"We're here." Her guard, Robert, said.

"Really? You mean it, Bob?" Charlotte said sarcastically, holding her wrists out and patiently waiting for the guards to uncuff her.

"Don't give him any lip, Charlotte. Do it again and I'll penalize you." The other guard, William said, giving her a good scolding.

"Dr. Carmichael is waiting for you inside." Robert said, holding the door open for her.

"Thank you, Bob." Charlotte said, doing a curtsey in her orange jumpsuit. She twirled into the room to be greeted by fairly young woman, probably in her mid to late 40's. She turns on the tape recorder.

"Patient's name is Charlotte White, also known as 'Eris.'"

"That's me!" Charlotte exclaimed.

"Her diagnoses include Disorganized Schizophrenia, Schizotypal Personality Disorder, ADHD, and possibly OCD. I am currently still running diagnostics for more disorders. Anyways, on with the session. Well, you seem to be unusually happy today." She said.

"Is that so?" Charlotte asked.

"Well, with you, you can never really tell." Dr. Carmichael said.

"Well, of course **I **can tell, but the **question **is, can **you** tell?" Charlotte replied.

"How was 'Games and Recreation?'" Dr. Carmichael asked, ignoring her statement.

"Excellent! I think I made a new friend."  
"What's your new friend's name, Charlotte?"

"His name is Eddie."

"Eddie? As in Edward?"

"Yep."

"Edward Nigma?"

"You hit it right on the mark! Or rather, the question mark."

"Enough of your wordplay, Charlotte. How have you been feeling?"

"Fine. But I hate my meds."

"You always hate your medications. We've tried Prolixin, Trilafon, Haldol... I thought that the Thorazine that you're on was working wonders for you."  
"Oh, Penny, there's just something that I despise about my medications."

"Charlotte, please, let's be professional. I insist that you call me Dr. Carmichael. And is there something wrong with your Thorazine dosage? I can put you on a new medication. Latuda is a godsend for most people with schizophrenia."

"But that's just the problem. I don't want to be on my medications."

"And why don't you want to take your medications, Charlotte?"

"You're a smart lady, I think you'll figure it out on your own."

"If you're worried about the possible weight gain that most medications have, Latuda has shown no signs of weight gain in most patients. In fact, most patients actually lose a few pounds when switching over-"

"Put me on whatever you want to put me on, it's not like I have much of a choice here, anyways."

"... I hope you'll be happier on the Latuda, Charlotte."

Charlotte rolled her eyes. She hated her medications, the **control** she felt like they had over her.

"I'm quitting your Thorazine dosage from now on. We'll switch you over tomorrow night. Your Thorazine should be wearing off soon, and should completely leave your system by tomorrow night, allowing a clean slate for the Latuda, so to say."

"Or you could just take me off my medications. Or at least lower the dosage." Charlotte suggested, grimacing at the photos on the desk.

"You know I can't do that, Charlotte. All inmates are required to be medicated during the duration of their stay, and that includes you. Anyways, lets talk about 'Games and Recreation.' You met the Riddler?"

"I did."

"What's your impression of him?"

"Interesting personality. Fairly average looking_*****_. Although he's **quite **the charmer." she said, smiling.

"Has he met Keiko?"

"He has. In fact, they just met today, during 'Games and Recreation.'"

"And how did they get along?"

"Keiko doesn't seem to like him. Although I'm not sure what Edward thinks of her."

"I see. Lets talk about your need for criminal mischief. What compels you to commit the crimes you do?"

"Well, I'd hardly call them crimes. To me, they're more like acts of protests against society." Charlotte explained.

"Acts of protests? How so?"

"Well, Batman himself is no better than a criminal. The way he cheats, his fear tactics, beats people senselessly, he's even **worse **than me."

"And why do you say that?"

"I don't cheat. I don't beat people. I don't even kill people, despite the stigma attached to being a psycho. I even try to fight for the rights of others, and people still make me out to be a villain. Whereas Batman oppresses the people who try to take a stand up to the tyranny of the government, and he needs to be stopped."

"And your want for anarchy?"

"Society has failed. We need to abolish our oppressive government and learn how to fend for ourselves. We need to start over. We'll learn to live with one another and put petty differences aside. Only the strong and the cunning will survive."

"And as for the others?"

"The weak and the stupid will fail to survive and die out, but that's not so bad, is it?"

"Well, everyone deserves to live, do they not?"

"One could argue that, but if everyone deserves to live, then why are there people on death row?"

The doctor just looked at her, giving off a perplexed look.

"What is it?" Charlotte gave out a chuckle.

"If I may express an opinion, it's just that you're very... confusing."

"Please, tell me why. I can use it for future reference." She teased.

"Well, earlier this week, you were talking about how people need to be praised and how all life is valuable. But now you're talking about how only the strong and cunning should survive, and the weak and stupid should die. Anyways, our time is pretty much up. I'll switch your medications tomorrow. You'll gain back some of your typical symptoms by the evening, but I think you'll still function enough to interact with others."

She got up from her desk, and called for her guards.

"Thank you for your time, Charlotte."

"Sure thing, Penny." Charlotte says, letting her guards cuff her.

* * *

They transported her to the Mess Hall, so she could get her lunch. The guards uncuffed her, and dropped her off at the end of the line. She grabbed a tray.

"Hey, Pammy! What's on the special?" She asked, full of enthusiasm.

The lunch lady just glared at her, and piled some spoonfuls of slop onto her tray.

"The usual, I see. Thank you, Pammy." Charlotte said, leaving the lunch line and searching for Keiko. She located her at their usual table, and to her pleasure, Edward was there as well.

"Hello you two!" She said, dropping her tray on the table and taking a seat. "How did the rest of 'Games and Recreations' go for you two after I left?"

"Just fine." Keiko said.

"It was very... intriguing. But, still not as intriguing as you." He winked at her.

"You're too kind, Mister Nigma." She said, playing with her food.

"You're not going to eat?" He asked Charlotte.

"Not even pigs should be allowed to eat this slop." She explained, grimacing at her food.

Edward chuckled at her comment.

"Lettie, if you don't want it, then I'll eat it." Keiko said.

"Oh, and I've been meaning to ask you, 'Lettie'?" Edward asked.

"It's a nickname of mine that friends use." She tells him, as she passes her tray over to Keiko.

"I thought we were friends though?" He said, smirking suggestively.

"Oh, of course we are, Mister Nigma." She grinned.

"Well then, do I have permission to call you 'Lettie'?"

"You can call me whatever you'd like to call me, Mister Nigma." She says, grinning even more.

"How was your session with Dr. Carmichael?" Keiko asked, breaking up their flirting.

"It was alright, I suppose. She wants to switch my medications. **Again**." She sighed.

"When is she switching you?"

"I take my first dosage tomorrow night."

"And when is she quitting your Thorazine?"

"Right now. My orange juice shouldn't be drugged." She said, sipping from it. "It doesn't taste bitter..."

"Can I have it?"

"Knock yourself out."

"Do you take everything of Charlotte's, Keiko?" Edward asked her.

"No. She just doesn't like jail food." Keiko said, taking a spoonful from the meal.

"I usually drink the juice, since it contains my drugs in it." Charlotte said.

"But you just said that you don't like your medications." Edward replied.

"True, but I can comply and just drink a simple glass of juice, or I can have them strap me down and either force feed me my pills or use an IV, and on top of that be penalized. And neither of those sound very fun. I don't think the juice method is a very good method anyways, but, you can't have everything, I guess."

"And why do you say that?"

"Well, when they grind up my pills and mix them in the juice, the juice becomes bitter. So, being the logical and rational people they are, they load it up with sugar, which only aggravates my symptoms and disorders. And the drugs they put me on are not always 100% guaranteed to 'fix' my problems, so it makes sense." She said being incredibly sardonic.

Edward smiled in amusement at her mockery.

_**RIIIINNNGGG!**_

Pairs of guards came rushing through the doors, scrambling around the room and looking for their designated inmates.

"It's time to go, Keiko." One of her guards said, taking caution.

Keiko complied, and left the Mess Hall with no complications.

"Your friend seems a bit off." Edward told Charlotte.

"We are in an asylum, after all." Charlotte said, sticking her wrists out and allowing her guards to cuff her. "I'll see you when I see you, Mister Nigma." She said, leaving the Mess Hall and back to her cell.

* * *

_**A/N: * I'm going based off of his appearance in the New 52, with his sideburns and all. But you can use whatever version you'd like to use :)**_

_**A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~**_


	4. Let the Games Begin!

The day eventually passed, slowly and sluggishly. Charlotte was being escorted to her cell after a hard day's work. The Asylum had a special ward set up just for Batman's rogues. Each cell was specially fortified based off of each one's abilities to successfully contain each rogue. Unlike the other cells, these didn't use bars, instead, they used seven-inch thick bulletproof glass. There were no windows or openings to the cells, they were all air-tight. This meant that you couldn't talk to anyone else but your cellmate, and that was only if you were lucky enough to have one. Since there were no windows, it was all artificial light. Everything in the ward was a blank white. The walls were white, the beds were white, the floors were white, **everything **was white, and it irked the both of them. The **conformity **of everything, it was sickening to them. Most of the rogues took the liberty of trying to personalize their cells. Poison Ivy might draw leaves on the walls, Edward draws green question marks, Scarecrow drew snakes, and Charlotte drew golden apples and Keiko the anarchist symbol.

"We're here." Robert said, approaching Charlotte's cell.

"Oh, goody." Charlotte, replied, looking at the glass cell. Keiko had been patiently biding her time in there. They uncuffed her, and stuffed her in there.

"Hello, Lettie." Keiko greeted her.

"Greetings, Koko." Charlotte sighed. "I hate it here."

"Who wouldn't? Everything and everyone's the same here."

"The way they're trying to brainwash and turn us into common civilians... it's **awful**..." Charlotte frowned.

"Have you thought of a way to bust us out of here yet?"

"I was thinking of short circuiting the wiring for the door. But I don't have the tools to drill into the wall."

"Well, I could just bust my fist through the wall and rip out the wires." Keiko joked.

"No, no, but thanks for the suggestion." Charlotte giggled. "But do you think you'd be able to bust a hole in a different part of the wall, and then rip your way to where the wires would be?"

"It would take some effort, but I think I could do it."

They both smiled at each other.

"So," Charlotte said, breaking their silence, "How did the rest of the games go with Edward after I left?"

"Fine."

"How did the two of you get along?"

"Fine."

"Okay, what did you guys talk about?"

"I told him that I didn't want to see him try out anything funny on you. It's obvious that he has a little crush on you."

"Koko, I don't take any offense in a bit of flirting and playful wordplay."

"I don't trust him though."

"Me either, but that's what makes it fun."

"Do you even hear yourself talking?"

"I do."

"Charlotte, he's dangerous, he's a criminal."

"And we're criminals too, but we're all not that bad. I know you're worried, and I thank you for that, but I'll be fine."

Keiko looked down, frustrated.

"Hey... If it makes you happy, I'll take more caution, okay?" She assured her. "Did you play any games afterwards?"

"Yes... but not with him. I played a game of solitaire by myself."

"Somehow, that doesn't really surprise me." Charlotte laughed. "Did you win though?" She teased.

"Yes." Keiko smiled at her.

At that, they heard a loud whistle, and all of the lights shut off.

"Well... I'll see you in the A.M., Keiko." Charlotte said as she crawled into her bunk.

"Yeah... See you then." Keiko replied, as they both dozed off.

* * *

The next day in Games and Recreations, Edward arrived to see Charlotte talking to a tall, lanky man.

"Hello, Jonathan." Edward said, approaching the man.

"Hello, Edward. Fancy meeting you here." He replied.

"It must be destiny." Charlotte teased.

"What were you two talking about?" Edward asked her.

"Good ol' Johnny here is trying to convince me to play a game of chess with him. But..." the two men took caution, looking at the grin growing on her face, "... You're a **much more **worthy opponent, and more likely to win." She said, rhyming.

The two men looked at each other in disbelief.

"Oh, you're good." Jonathan said, sitting down in his seat.

Edward remained standing up. He didn't want to let **anyone **manipulate him, and that included Charlotte.

"Aw, what's wrong, Edward?" Jonathan teased.

"Yeah, Mister Nigma? Afraid of the Scarecrow?" She taunted.

"**No**." He said sternly, the smirk still on his face. He pulled up the seat across from Jonathan, the two of them already glaring at each other_ *****_. He wasn't going to lose this chance to impress Charlotte and make a buffoon of Jonathan in the process. Jonathan took the first move, advancing a pawn. Edward advances the pawn opposite from him, pulling the same move.

"Are you copying me? That should be considered cheating, and you should be disqualified." Jonathan teased and Charlotte giggled. He moves the pawn next to it, so that the two middle pawns are advanced.

"Shut it, Jonathan." Edward sneered, advancing the knight to his left.

"Well, this looks **very **interesting and all, but I don't want to be around when one of you loses and tries to strangle the victor. I'll be playing Clue with Keiko, if any of you want me. Me. Me. Me. Me..." She said, starting to wander off.

"You're not even going to watch?" Edward asked, trying to hide his frustration.

"Go ahead, Lettie. We'll both come and get you before the game ends." Jonathan assured her. He copied Edward.

"Thank you, Johnny. I'll be on my way now. Now. Now. Now..." she said, repeating herself as she wandered off.

Edward just looked at her, puzzled.

"You don't know?" Jonathan teased.

"Know what?" Edward replied. He advanced the pawn second to last on his left side.

"The great Edward Nigma **doesn't **know?" He positions the bishop next to the king behind one of his pawns.

"Know** what**?" he asked, irritated. He positions the same bishop, but places it where his previous pawn was.

"I'm absolutely shocked you know don't know." He moves his king ahead by one space.

"Stop teasing me, Crane, and tell me." He demanded. He moves the pawn third to last on his right side ahead one.

"She's an interesting woman, you know." Jonathan smirked. He copies Edward's move. "She once told me that she likes to collect insects and encase them in resin."

"Why?" Edward moves the pawn second to last on his right side ahead.

"She says she likes the way some of their wings gleam and glitter. The array of ornate colors. Their elaborate anatomies." Jonathan moves his left knight next to his king. "Tell me, how many girls do you know actually like bugs? Let alone collect them?"

"She's the first I know of." Edward copies his move, but positions the knight so it's in front of his king.

"She also told me how she wanted to be a marine biologist when she was little." He moves his bishop into the far corner by two of Edward's pawns. "She wanted to be a deep sea explorer, and discover what mysteries would be hiding in the deep, dark depths of the ocean. She was even taking college courses, but she got kicked out."

"Oh? How did that happen?" Edward asked, agitated. He claimed Jonathan's bishop using his own. _"How could Jonathan know so much more than me?" _Edward thought to himself. _"She rarely ever opens up. Or at least, to me. What makes Jonathan so special?_" Edward was overcome with feelings of jealousy and inadequacy.

"I even know why she took up professional crime and became Eris. Wondering how I learned so much about her?" Jonathan takes Edwards bishop with his king.

Edward remained silent. He moves his other bishop next to the pawn on his far right.

"How about we have a little bet, hmm? And raise the stakes a bit?" He advances the pawn to the far left ahead one space.

"I'm listening, Crane." Edward advances the pawn in front of his queen two spaces.

"If you win, I'll tell you how I learned these things about Lettie, and I'll also tell you everything I know about her." He moves his king two spaces to his left, and positions his rook to the right of his king.

"And if for some reason I lost? What do you want from me?" Edward asked, heeding caution. He moves his king in front of his queen.

"Seeing your humiliation after losing both a bet **and **a game with me in front of Lettie is good enough for me." He moves his king once to his left.

"Well, I'm **not** going to lose to a simple-minded freak like you, so you have a deal." Edward agreed. He advances the pawn to his far right ahead one space.

"I wouldn't make idle threats so early into our game, Edward." Jonathan retorted. He retreats his left knight back into its original position.

"So, are you interested in Charlotte?" Edward moves his king to the right by two spaces, and places his rook to the left of it.

"Well, not as interested as you are in her, I would think." He moves his knight to his left, placing it between a pawn and the other knight.

"What are you trying to say?" He moves one of his pawns forward and claims one of Jonathan's pawns.

"It's obvious you have a little crush on her. She's smart, she's funny, and she's got a hell of a body. A bit on the short side, but..." Edward moves again, taking another of Jonathan's pawns with the one he used previously. "... we're both tall men, so I figure you might actually like that. The sex could get interesting, too." He teased.

"Well, I **don't **have a crush on her. Romance is of no interest to me. Sex with her? Maybe, it's too soon for me to tell. I hear she's not into sex, so it would be fun trying to seduce her... But I don't want anything to do with actual romance. After all, she's just a puzzle. Something to bide my time with as I try to figure out how to make my escape. And '**both**'? What are you planning on doing, Scarecrow?"

"... All's fair in love and war, Edward." He claimed the pawn Edward was using with his rook.

"Even after I testify against love, you insist that to be my main motivator." He advances a pawn one space ahead.

"And?" Jonathan retreats his rook.

"Well, it's obvious **you **also have a crush on her, and you're just trying to irritate me with it." He moves his knight to his right, surrounding it with pawns.

"'**Also**?' My, my, Edward, you weren't hard to figure out." Crane advances his pawn second to last on his right ahead one space.

"A poor choice of words, but you should stop projecting your feelings onto someone as complex and unique as myself." He moves his king to his right by one space.

"Maybe if you weren't so defensive, I'd cease my activities." He moves his knight ahead to his left, surrounding himself with Edward's pieces.

"Why would you cease when you're obviously turning this into a game?" Edward retreats his bishop to the right corner of his side of the game board.

"So, it's a game now?" Crane moves his bishop up and over to the left three spaces.

"... I guess you could say it is now. After all, **you** made it one." Edward moves a pawn ahead one space.

"The first one to seduce Lettie and gets her to sleep with them in bed is the victor." Jonathan chuckled. He moves his king backwards toward the right three spaces.

"... Those are odd terms, but... I'll play along, if you wish." Edward moves his king up and over one space.

"Oh! Don't force yourself, Eddie!" He moves his rook over to the left by three spaces. His two rooks are dead centered in his first row.

"I wont have to. This is going to be **easy**." He smirked. He moved a pawn forward.

They exchanged moves, claiming each others pieces, until the game board became scarce.

"You have no hope, Edward. You might as well just resign." Jonathan taunted. "Should I bring Lettie over here, so she can witness your defeat?"

"No, that won't be necessary."

"Are you sure? If you resign, I won't have to bring Lettie over here."

Edward looked over at her. She was playing Clue with Keiko. He couldn't help but notice how frustrated Keiko looked. It wasn't like a defeated look, no, this was a "stop being an idiot" face. He didn't know what exactly know what was wrong with her, but he could tell that Charlotte wasn't all the way there.

"On second thought... Sure, bring her over here." Edward said.

"... Are you sure?" Jonathan asked.

"Yes. Bring her here."

"Okay..." Jonathan got up, and dragged Charlotte over there.

"Yes?" She asked. She was smiling, but as usual, her face was blank otherwise.

"Edward wanted to tell you that he loves you." Jonathan teased.

"And I love you. So that makes two." She teased back.

"No, I wasn't." Edward defended. "Could you please watch our game?"

"But, if your castle is collapsing, do you set your horse on fire, or do you shoot it in the eye?" Charlotte asked.

"... What?"

"You're not going to get anywhere with her right now." Keiko told them. "You might as well end your dick fight, because it's all for naught when she's in this state."  
"Well, what's wrong with her?" Edward asked as he sneered at Keiko.

"A lot of things." Charlotte answered. "I'm really hungry. Food would help that. My favorite food is apples. I once shot an apple with an arrow. Arrows are dangerous, I don't like using them."

"To make her answer short, she needs medicine. And luckily, lunch is right around the corner." Keiko said.

And with that, the girls' guards came in.

"Time for lunch, Charlotte."

"Oh! Lunch! I sure could eat a bunch!" she said as they cuffed her.

"We'll meet up with you guys at lunch." Keiko told the boys.

The guards escorted them out.

"Well, that was interesting." Edward said.

"Yes. I can't wait for lunch." Jonathan replied.

* * *

_**A/N: I hope this wasn't too long. I wanted to split it up into two chapters, but I wasn't sure where to split it, haha.**_

_**Things are gonna get interesting, with Johnny and Eddie competing for attention~**_

_***For simplicity's sake, I copied a game. Which I'm a bit ashamed of, but... I thought it would be easier fo you guys to follow, maybe? If you want to follow along, look up Kasparov's Immortal. Most of the site you click on have diagrams, so it would be really easy to follow :) I'd post the link, but it wont let me :(  
Anyways, I love reviews, so if you wanna drop one off, I have no problem with that.**_

_**A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~**_


	5. The Cause of Confusion

**_Things get interesting in this chapter. ;)  
_**

* * *

When the boys arrived, they saw Keiko trying to calm down Lettie.

"Take your juice please, Charlotte." Keiko asked Charlotte.

"No, you can't make me. Just look at me, I'm so free. Just like a birdy." She replied.

"Charlotte," an agitated Keiko said, "We're in a fucking concrete pen. Free does not exist here."

"You're right, but everything eventually sees the light."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means what it means, don't be so peeved." Charlotte replied, angry that Keiko wasn't understanding her.

"Trying to get her to take her medication?" Jonathan asked, as the two men took their seats at the table.

"Yes, and she's being a stubborn ass and isn't cooperating." She insulted Lettie.

"That wasn't nice! I ought to stuff your mouth with this rice."

"Have you tried holding her nose?" Edward said.

"Yes, but she started breathing through her teeth." Keiko answered. "Lettie, if you don't take your juice, they're going to stick you full of needles."  
"What? That ain't nothing but a bluff."

"Erwen said that when she admitted her mother, she didn't want to take any medications. So, they stuck her full of giant needles. And they were all fixed to these gargantuan bags of fluids. You know what happened to her?" Keiko said.

"**What**?" Charlotte asked, full of horror.

"And then, she began to overdose on that, so they had to fill her up with **different **needles. That poor woman was so sore after all of those needles..."

At that, Charlotte grabbed the juice and chugged it all down.

"She doesn't like needles?" Edward asked, amused.

"She has trypanophobia, the phobia of needles." Jonathan answered with a smile.

"Really?"

"Yeah," Keiko said, "she's **horrified **of them. Just being around them makes her anxious. Even mentioning the word makes her anxious."

"Needles are not needed?" Charlotte asked.

"You'll be fine." Keiko assured her.

Charlotte started playing around with her food.

"Still not eating your food?" Jonathan asked.

"Johnny, the idiochefs don't know how to cook their jobs. I can't believe that they don't have any fruimeats, or at least apples or something... I like apples, they're my favorite fruit. Most apples are red or green, but my mosrite color would have to be white-red or just plain white. One of my rabbits is white. Her name is Binky. A binky is also-"

"Charlotte?" Jonathan interrupted.

"Yes?" She replied.

"Stop making up words and please eat your food."

"But why should I even try?"

"If you eat all your food, I'll let you sit next to me." He answered, smiling suggestively.

Keiko grew agitated.

"And since you drank all your juice, I'll let you sit on my lap." Edward said, smirking at Jonathan and Charlotte.

Keiko became furious, fuming with anger.

"For me? Really?" She asked.

"Anything for you, my dear." Edward replied, patting his lap and inviting her to sit on it.

Jonathan glared at him, and Charlotte happily took a seat in Edward's lap.

"Lettie, are you going to eat your food?" Jonathan asked.

"No, it's pretty comfy on his lap." She said happily, jumping up and down slightly against his body.

_**THUMP!**_

Keiko nailed him in the face, and Edward ended up on the ground, with Charlotte on top of him. Jonathan was laughing and laughing, he could barely breathe!

"You'd take advantage of a mentally ill woman?!" She said, fuming with anger. "You ought to be ashamed of yourself!"

"Hey, **she** was the one rubbing herself on me!" Edward defended as he wiped traces of blood off of his lip.

"I was." Charlotte said happily, rubbing up and down on him some more.

"Because she's not mentally well." Keiko said, grabbing Charlotte and directing her back to her seat.

"So then? What's wrong with her? I think I deserve an explanation after that." He said as he crawled back into his seat.

"She has disorganized schizophrenia." Jonathan explained. "It's like normal schizophrenia, but, it's characterized by illogical and nonsensical thought patterns, incredibly inappropriate or sexual behaviors, and absent or inappropriate emotions. It's usually considered to be a more severe form of schizophrenia, because they're usually unable to carry out daily activities when it's unmonitored. Although they can live pretty normal lives on medication."

"Exactly. The rhyming she does? The repetitive words? The nonsense she spits out? Even the grimaces, the random laughter, the words she makes up, and her blank faces. These are all caused by her schizophrenia. The poor girl can't even think straight unless she's on medication." Keiko explained further.

"Can't think straight? Give me an example." Edward said.  
"Once, she was hungry, but she also wanted to take a shower. Her solution? Bathe herself in the cereal and milk she was going to eat. But... it should be noted that behavior happened during a much more severe episode." Keiko added.

"That was one time, and I realized it was a crime." Charlotte said in her defense.

"I'm guessing that's her rhyming?" Edward asked.

"Yes. And it's called 'clanging'." Jonathan answered.

"Anyways, she'll be okay within the next couple of minutes. Her medications usually start working within the next half hour." Keiko said.

"Boo." Charlotte grimaced.

"Although, since it's a new medication, it probably wont take full effect for a week or two." Jonathan added.

"Woo-hoo!" Charlotte cried.

"Charlotte, would you be as kind as to go out on a date with me?" Jonathan asked, snaking his way to the seat next to her.

"Hmmm..." she was actually starting to think about it.

"I can't believe you two!" Keiko scolded. "It doesn't matter anyways."

"And why not?"

"Because, when she grabs a hold of her wits again, she'll pretty much consider most of her answers invalid because of her disordered state of mind, so there's really no point in asking her now." She explains.

"Then I'll just asked her later."

"... Okay..."

"So, Keiko, what do the three of you girls do for fun?" Edward asked.

"That's the best insult you could come up with?" Jonathan asked.

"I was talking about Erwen."

"Well... We're pretty normal people. I mean, we like board games and card games. We play Clue a lot. Clue is Lettie's favorite." Keiko answered.

"She likes detectives?" Edward asked, incredibly interested.

"You don't even know. She doesn't care for much television, but she **loves **shows like Monk and Psych. She's recently taken an interest in Hannibal, especially because she loved the books and movies growing up. And don't even **think** of interrupting her when she's watching Sherlock or Elementary."

"Detectives... How interesting. I'll have to play a game of Clue with her one day." Edward grinned. He was very pleased with this information.

"What do you like to do for fun, Mister Nigma?" Charlotte asked.

"He probably wants to do you for fun, the pervert." Jonathan said, teasing Edward.

"Please stop projecting yourself onto me, Crane. And I'd really like to play a game with **you**, Charlotte." Edward said.

"I thought that we already were." She replied suggestively.

"I'm surrounded by perverts." Keiko cried out.

"And what kind of game are we playing, Charlotte?"

"I'm not really so sure... But, whatever it is we're playing, I like it." She grinned at him.

"So, what games do you like to play?"

"Well, I do like to play Clue, but I also like Risk, Scrabble, and Rummikube a lot. And Monopoly can be fun, but it usually drags on and loses its charm after a while. Ha ha ha!"

"Risk is fun. Have you ever played Scattergories?" Jonathan asked her.

"Yes, but we don't play it very often. When you're playing with a bunch of geniuses, the lists are usually endless and the debates on whether something is or isn't valid become tedious."

"Plus we usually end up running out of paper by the end of the game." Keiko added.

"Ha! We do." Charlotte said.

"You collect bugs?" Edward asked.

"... Well... I **used **to... but that was a while ago. I don't really collect them anymore."

"Why were you interested in insects?"

"I'm not so sure why they interest me, they just do. Their social behaviors, the vast color schemes, differentiating anatomies... they're just interesting."

"Deep-sea biologist?"

"Ha ha! The ocean is a vast and mysterious place... I take it that **Johnny **over here spilled the beans on me."

"Not too much. I hope you don't mind, Lettie." Jonathan apologized.

"No, no, no, not at all... although you will be penalized if you do it again." She said, wagging her finger as she mocked the guards.

"Can I ask you more questions? Specifically about your childhood?" Edwards asked.

"Why my childhood? It was fairly boring, to be honest." Charlotte replied.

"A genius child born to a neglectful mother and a workaholic father? Who was also in the genius class? That sounds plenty interesting to me."

"I assure you, Edward, it is." Jonathan teased.

"I'm sorry, but my answer is no. Absolutely not." She said.

"It's a touchy subject, you see."

"Sure, it's the root of all my problems. Why didn't my mother love me?" She exclaimed dramatically, sniveling with a fake crying face attached.

"Oh stop it, Lettie. You should tell him soon, or else **I'll **tell the poor man about us." Keiko scolded.

"... Soon. I'll tell you soon, Edward. I just don't like to talk about my personal life outside of private areas." She explained to him.

Fair enough, I suppose. Although, you could give me one detail about yourself to make up for the wait." He smirked.

"Is it my age?" She smiled.

"Yes. How old are you?"

"Would you believe me if I said I was 42?"

"She's 28 years old." Keiko answered.

"Always ruining my fun." She grimaced.

"You look younger than your age. I thought you were at most 24."

"Oh, Mister Nigma. Always flattering me." She smiled. "It runs in the family. Particularly my mother's side. When I last saw her, she was 36, but she didn't look a day past 30..." she recounted as she started spacing out.

"Her mother was evil." Jonathan said.

"Well... I wouldn't say that... She was usually-"

**__****RIIIINNNGGG!**

Guards came flying through the doors, looking for their inmates.

"... Ah, well... I'll save my mother for a later date." Charlotte said, getting up from her seat as her guards approached her.

Their guards came in and cuffed them as well.

"See you soon, Lettie." Jonathan said, being escorted away by his guards.

"I'll talk to you lovely ladies later." Edward said, winking at Charlotte.

"And I'll talk you you handsome men when I see you again." She winked back before her guards cuffed her and escorted her out.

"Stuff it, Nigma." Keiko said as she was being taken away by her guards.

"C'mon, Nigma. It's time to see your shrink." One of his guards said, attempting to cuff him.

"Very well. It's not like I have a choice anyways." He said as he let them cuff him.

"Off we go." The other guard said, as they led him to his psychiatrist's office.

* * *

_**A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~**_


	6. Tales of Tricksters

"Patient's name is Edward Nigma, also know as the Riddler. The patient's currently known diagnoses are Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Hello, Edward. How are you feeling?" Dr. Carmichael asked him.

"Same as always." He said, taking a seat in her office.

"You were put into Games and Rec not too long ago. How has that been going?"

"Good. I enjoy playing games with Eris and Scarecrow. Riot is there too, but she doesn't seem to take to me too kindly around."

"Eris and Riot? How do you get along with those two?"

"As I just said, I get along with Charlotte perfectly, but Keiko doesn't like me. Not one bit."

"And how does that make you feel?"

"I don't care about what Keiko says, or how she feels about me. As long as she doesn't interrupt the games I play with Charlotte."

"She's gotten in the middle of you two?"

"She's a bit defensive of her friend. Or she's just jealous." He cackled.

"And why would Keiko be jealous?"

"I give the majority of my attention to Charlotte, so why wouldn't she be jealous?"

"Keiko is a recovering sociopath and shows signs of being a schizoid, and Charlotte is really one of the only two people she chooses to care about. So I think your former theory is more along the lines."

"Think what you'd like to think, Doctor."

"You and Scarecrow act as rivals sometimes, how is the friendship between the two of you?"

"Hardly a friendship, I'd say. Although we have been rivals as of late."

"What kind of competition have you engaged in?"

"We're both trying to see who can seduce Charlotte first." He smirked. "I'm sure I'll win, though, so he might as well just give up now and save his pathetic efforts."  
"Wow. You two do know that sexual activity isn't permitted in the asylum, right?"

"Oh, we're just toying with feelings currently."

"Right. And what motivates you to play this game with him?"

"Well, when I win, I will have asserted my superiority over Jonathan. Also, Keiko doesn't want me near Charlotte. And, to add to all of this, Charlotte said she rarely sleeps with men. So, it's also about the challenge."

"I see. How do you feel about Charlotte, aside from sexual attraction?"

"What are you talking about?" He laughed. "I'm not really that sexually attracted to her. It's just a game."

"But what do you like about her? Why do you see her as a game?"

"She's peculiar. She doesn't like to talk about her past. And she practically speaks in riddles during her psychotic breaks. She also constantly denies answers for my questions. What's not intriguing about her?"

"I see. So, her behavior is what intrigues you?"

"You could say that."

"And you don't get along with Keiko?"

"No. She doesn't like how I play with Charlotte. The idiot thinks that I want something long-term with her friend."

"Well, I don't think that's a bad assumption for her to make. They are best friends, after all. They're supposed to watch each other's backs."

"I don't like it, either way."

"I see. How have you been feeling since you've started receiving treatment for your NPD?"

"The same as I did before. I think you're all the insane ones for thinking I'm a narcissist. I obviously don't need those treatments."

"Well, I do agree with you somewhat. You wont get anywhere until you realize your problem with narcissism and agree to receive treatment for it."

"But I don't have NPD, Doctor."

"... My only wish is to help you, Edward." She said as she glanced at the clock. "Well, Edward, I have to keep you on your treatments seeing as how it's the court's orders. I'll talk to you again soon."

"Likewise, Doctor." He said, as he left the room.

* * *

A week had passed since the incident at the Mess Hall. The routine had remained largely the same, the four of them would meet up in Games and Recreation on the weekdays, and have lunch together afterwards. The asylum would let inmates out in a yard once a week, so they wouldn't get any crazier from anxiety after being cooped up all the time. Jonathan and Keiko were walking around, talking about their favorite horror movies, and Charlotte was answering Edward's questions.

"So... Why a deep-sea explorer?" Edward asked Charlotte.

"I love the ocean. I love sea creatures, especially the ones from the deep. All the colors, and shapes, and sizes... The varieties are endless." Charlotte replied.

"I see."

"And to add to that, we've only explored five percent of the ocean. Five percent, can you believe that? I would have loved to have been able to explore the deep-sea floor."

"Your favorite fish?"

"Oh! There are so many to choose from, and I love so many. I love jellyfish, crabs, and I really like sharks, but I like orcas more."

"Why is that?"

"They're like sharks in the way that they're both tough and merciless killers, but orcas are more... intelligent. They're incredibly playful, curious, and being as intelligent as they are, they often play pranks and tricks on humans. Some of them even teach these tricks to their kin."

"Interesting. Any unusual kinds of fishes you like?"

"I love Phronimas. They're these small, strange, and transparent alien looking things that like to burrow themselves into salps, using them as food for their young. In fact, they're so strange, that they were actually used as the inspiration for the Aliens from the 'Alien' franchise. And blobfishes. Blobfishes are hilarious."

"What are those?"

"They're these miserable, Jabba the Hut looking fishes that sort of just hover around the ocean floor, eating whatever floats around their faces." She giggled. "They're really not all that interesting, but they're hilarious to look at."

"What other animals do you like?"

"Rabbits are probably my favorite. I have two of them at home. Bonk and Binky."

"Is it because they're cute little fuzzy vermin that like to hop around?" He mocked.

"Not at all." She replied with her smile. "Although I do admit that I think they're adorable, I love them because of the trickster reputation they have."

"Trickster reputation?" He smiled as he raised his brow in interest.

"As you probably know, they're revered as tricksters in many cultures. Do you know how their noses got that little split in the middle?"

"Tell me."

"In an old African folktale, the Moon sent down the rabbit to bring a very important gift to humans. The sacred gift of immortality. The Moon told Rabbit the message he was to give to them. 'Please tell them, that just as I die and rise again, so shall you.' But the Rabbit, being the trickster buffoon that he was, purposely gets the message wrong, bestowing mortality and death on human-kind, and keeping immortality for himself. The Moon became so enraged, that he confiscates his immortality and beats the Rabbit with all his fury, and splits Rabbit's nose in the process."

"What an amusing story." He smirked.

"Rabbits were also an important to the lives of the Aztecs, and an important group of rabbit gods were known as the Centzon-Totochtin. They were 400 drunken and immoral party-goers who often brought misery to the people with their antics." She laughed.

"Oh my." He chuckled. "Your favorite color?"

"Although I love pinks, corals, and peaches, I do wear white and gold often. It's even my main color scheme for when I work."

"How dull."

"I wear it for the laughs." She smiled.

"The laughs?"

"Well, white here in the western world symbolizes purity, bliss, sanctity, peace, and virginity... And I'm the exact opposite of all those things. I'm more of an immoral and sadistic trickster who likes to cause chaos and calamity, just because I can. I love seeing Batman and Gotham City wiggling and squirming in their own pain and frustration." She grins.

He laughs at her response.

"Why all the chaos?" he asks.

"She obviously likes chaos, Edward. Surely I thought that a man of your intellect would be able to figure that out." Jonathan teased as he and Keiko took their seats.  
"I know. I just wanted to hear her explanation." Edward replied.

"So, you don't even know what to talk about?" He teased further.

"Have you seen any of the other rogues around here?" Keiko asked them, changing the subject.

"I've seen Penguin around." Jonathan said.

"And I saw Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy being dragged into their cell not too long ago." Edward added.

"As did I." Charlotte confirmed. "I've also seen the Mad Hatter crawling around out here on multiple occasions."

"Have you heard the rumor?" A strange, large-headed man inquired as he approached the four of them.

"Well, speak of the devil." Jonathan said. "Such a delight seeing you here, **Jervis**."

* * *

**_A/N: What's the Mad Hatter up to? _**

**_A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~_**


	7. An Invitation

"What rumor?" Jonathan asked.

"Yes. What rumor?" Charlotte asked.

"Is it the one about the Joker breaking all of us out?" Edward asked.

"He wants to throw us a party! Do you think he'll serve tea?" the Hatter asked.

"If it's true, it would explain why Arkham's been reinforcing the hell out of everything lately." Keiko said.

"So, how did you get in here, Hatter?" Charlotte asked.

"I hurt Alice." He frowned.

"You hurt Alice?" Keiko asked.

"She didn't want any of my cakes or tea when I threw her a tea party." He replied, looking deeply hurt.

"So you... **hurt **her?" Charlotte asked, grimacing. She couldn't **stand** the Mad Hatter. She had always been deeply disgusted by pedophiles. Let alone rapists. "How did you hurt her?"

He started breaking down into tears.

"Did she wiggle? Did she cry? Did she scream? Was she happy?" Charlotte asked.

"No... **No**!" He cried more, delirious. She was enjoying this a bit too much.

"I think Alice's parents are going to be enraged with you, after learning what you did to their poor, poor, sweet Alice."

"Stop taunting him, Charlotte. Let the poor man be." Keiko scolded.

"As you wish." She hesitated.

"So, a tea party?" Keiko asked Jervis.

"Yes! A tea party for Batman! He wants to invite Dormouse, and March Hare, and Jabberwocky, and Duchess!" He happily replied.

"And what if we don't want to go?" Edward asked. "I've no interest in ambush at the moment."

"Same. I don't like messing around with the Joker." Charlotte agreed. "What if it's all some sort of plot for him to round us up and kill us all? It would be like his own little slaughterhouse."

"Joker would be most displeased with these news." Jervis sadly replied.

"Speaking of parties," Jonathan said, "Have you come up with an answer for the date I proposed?"

"Oh, my. Well... what kind of date?" Charlotte replied.

"We'll figure it out when we bust out of here. What do you say?" He glanced at Edward, and Edward glanced back at him.

"Well, I guess I don't see why not."

"Excellent!" He grinned at Edward and Charlotte.

"Duchess and March Hare?" Jervis raised his brow in confusion. "What about Jabberwocky and Dormouse?"

"They can come too. It can be like a double date!" Charlotte laughed.

"Don't even go there." Keiko sneered.

"Ah, sorry." She apologized.

"Although I have absolutely no desire to date Keiko, you my dear, look smashing." Edward winked at her.

"Oh, **my**. Two men in one day? I'm a lucky girl. I'll give it some thought, Mister Nigma." She replied. Although she did love the attention she was getting, she didn't feel comfortable accepting Edward's proposal right after accepting Jonathan's. Besides, it made her look like she was playing hard to get, which she knew would drive him **crazy**.

"I'm sure you'll come up with the correct answer." He replied.

"We'll see..." She shrugged indifferently. Dates... it had been such a long time since she had gone out with someone. They typically didn't go well for her. She usually tried to avoid them.

"So, this 'party.' Why does he want everyone to come?" Keiko asked.

"I haven't the slightest idea!" Jervis answered.

"We'll just have to find, I guess." Charlotte said.

The table became silent, with Jervis sitting there next to Charlotte. He was swinging his legs and humming The Unbirthday Song merrily.

"You know..." Charlotte began to say, "I think I saw a blonde woman hanging out over at that corner of the yard, by the basketball courts."

"Alice?" Jervis said, perking his head and looking around enthusiastically.

"Maybe! Why don't you go find out? Tell me about your little tea parties or whatever later."

He got up from his seat and happily scurried on over there.

"Did you really see a blonde woman, Lettie? Or are you just lying?" Jonathan asked her.

"Well, it **could **have been a woman. I didn't really see their face, but, we'll find out soon enough with Hatter's little report later on." She grinned.

"So you lied?" Edward asked, with the slightest hint of disgust in his smirk.

"No. I said I **thought **I saw a blonde woman. Which is exactly what I told him. Sure, I think it's more likely to be a man, but there's still a possibility of it being a woman..." She explained. "Besides, I'm tricking him all the time. You'd think he'd catch on to my habit of tricking people."

"So a half-truth?" He asked, picking up interest.

"Yeah, you could say that."

"So what did you two lovebirds talk about while Keiko and I were out for a walk?" Jonathan teased.

"Oh, nothing much, mainly simple questions and such..." Charlotte answered. "... Nothing very interesting."

"Things that **I **already know?" He teased further.

"Shh, Jonathan." She said, putting a finger on his lips. Her face dropped, and her voice began to crack. "Stop teasing the poor man." She said, teasing the both of them with her over dramatics.

"And this doesn't bother you?" Edward asked Keiko as he pointed at Charlotte and Jonathan.

"Well, no." She answered as she took Charlotte's hand off of Jonathan's lips. "Jonathan's an okay guy. Well, you know, asides from when he tries to gas people."

"Then why take her hand off his lips?" He asks.

"Because she doesn't know about societal norms."

"What do you mean I don't know about societal norms?" Charlotte asked, irritated.

"Well you were practically lap dancing Edward last week." Keiko responded with a slight sneer.

"And your point?" She grimaced slightly.

"That's exactly my point!" Keiko said, irritated.

"What's your opinion on societal norms?" Edward asked to end their bickering.

"I think they're stupid." Charlotte answered. "I believe in etiquette, but other than that..." she shrugged.

"Why?"

"Well, take for instance people like us."

"People like us?"

"Yes, people like us. Their poor civilian minds cannot even begin to comprehend the unique and complex thoughts that fill our minds, so they label us out of fear."

"Do they? Tell me more." He said. This was really interesting to him. _"So she doesn't think she's mentally ill, then?" _he thought. _" She doesn't find me mentally ill? Does she find me unique?"_

"Well, I know that for me, they don't see me as the eccentric person that I really am. They don't understand the way I think. And, you know how people are, they're **afraid** of what they don't understand. So, they label me with a disorder and stick me into their little concrete pen to isolate me from their perfect little society, and try to brainwash me into becoming a conforming member of society."

"Which is all hypocrisy in the first place since they're always preaching that it's okay to be 'unique' and 'different.'" He added.

"Exactly!"

"And I wouldn't worry about whatever disorders Dr. Carmichael says you have. She's an idiot who is unfit to diagnose her patients. She called me a narcissist, can you believe that?"

"I don't. I don't really believe in disorders. They're just different ways to label people. ...And there's nothing wrong with being proud of yourself. I thought that was good. It's important to be proud of yourself. It's what helps people survive, after all."

"See, Jonathan, **she's** smart enough to understand."

"I think his opinion would be a bit different since he was a psychiatrist, after all." She said.

"Well, we're all locked in here for a reason. However, I know for a fact that you're crazy, Lettie." Jonathan says.

"Well, I never said I don't believe in illness..." She said, looking around at her surroundings. Guards everywhere and whistles going off. She knew what was happening. Their time outside had run out. It was time to be put back in their pens. "And I guess I'll leave it at that." She quietly let out as their guards came up and cuffed them.

"I'll see you guys later." Keiko said.

"Yeah, I'll see you two boys later." Charlotte said. Their two pairs of guards hauled them off at the same time since they were both cell mates.

"An interesting conversation, wouldn't you say?" Edward said triumphantly, completely ignoring his guards' efforts in trying to drag him off.

"Don't get too cocky, Nigma. You've barely even scratched the surface." Jonathan replied as his guards took him to go see his psychiatrist.

* * *

_**Sorry for the late upload :(**_

_**A/N UPDATE: Reformatted~**_


	8. Preps and Puns

"What do you call a man with no arms nor legs who floats around aimlessly near the ocean's surface?" Edward asked the table as he picked at his food with his spork.

Don't know, don't care." Keiko said.

"I have a good idea, but I'll let you deliver the punch line." Charlotte smiled, sipping at her juice.

"**Bob.**" He smirked triumphantly.

"That's stupid." Keiko said.

Edward's face fell a little.

"But it's funny!" Charlotte laughed loudly, smiling at him assuredly. He smiled back, but with the slightest bit of hesitance. He wasn't in used to people doing that, people being nice to him. It was almost kind of weird. Nice, but so odd feeling.

"Hey..." Keiko said, searching around the Mess Hall, "... Where's Jonathan?"

"Solitary confinement." Edward said.

"What for?" Charlotte asked.

"He tried to gas his psychiatrist, Dr. Wilson." He answered.

"Ha! Good old Johnny strikes again!" She cheered as she took a spoonful of her pudding.

"Poor Jonathan..." Keiko said.

"Oh, I'm sure he'll be just fine." Charlotte said.

"Anyways... Let's talk about something more interesting." Edward said.

"Like?" Keiko asked.

"What were you two like in high school?"

"We were socially awkward and everyone hated us. And by that, I mean the girls hated us."

"The girls?"

"We were kind of cute in middle school, but in this kind of nerdy dork way. So you know, we were pretty much ignored by both the boys and girls." Keiko explained.

"But that was only until high school, in our defense." Charlotte added.

"And why is that?" Edward asked.

"Charlotte insisted that she, Erwen, and I got makeovers. 'Don't be a party pooper!' she said. 'We're gonna get all the boys' attention!' she said. 'Oh, it'll be so much fun!' she said. Well we got the makeovers. And it was **not **fun. I wiped that grease off of my face within the first week." Keiko said.

"Well, you've always been a bit of a tomboy. But I** loved **it. We looked **great**. Especially** me**. All the boys' heads would turn when we walked into the room, and the girls **hated **that. And, you've been in high school, so you probably know how jealous teenaged girls react. They bicker and belittle, and they try to ruin the person." Charlotte went on.

"So, it wasn't pleasant I imagine? Most people don't like that kind of thing." Edward said.

"Yeah, **most people**. But not Lettie. In fact, that was pretty much her main motivation to live back then." Keiko corrected him.

What?" He turned to Charlotte. "Why?" He grinned.

"I'm not really sure how to explain it. It's almost flattering when a person goes out of their way to try to hurt you. It's as if they've admitted 'Hey, I think you're **prettier** than me. I think you're** smarter** than me. I'm **scared** of you. I see you as a **threat**. And I'm too stupid to understand how to handle this, so I'm just going to throw fat jokes at you every chance I get.' It's kind of nice really..." Charlotte smiled as she stared out into space, happily sipping her juice. "... You get to see who destroys the other first, and it's... **wonderful**." She happily sighed out.

"Have you ever heard such messed up reasoning?" Keiko said.

He burst out in laughter. From what he gathered from their conversations so far, her viewpoint on humans was pretty messed up.

"Well, it is the best way to look at it. And reasoning like that is usually right. Why else would a person put so much effort into destroying another?" Edward said. "And what would they do?"

"The girls?" Keiko asked. "Well, once there was this prep named Connie, and she did not like Lettie. Around this time, pretty much every guy in school was accused of sleeping with Lettie, and this included Connie constantly accusing her boyfriend, Zeke, of sleeping around with her. Especially since he had a history of cheating. One day, Connie came up to Lettie and lightly cupped her belly and said 'Aw, is the baby your boyfriend's? I could tell she was pissed, but she softly removed Connie's hand from her stomach, looked her straight in the eye, smiled, and calmly said 'No, it's **your **boyfriend's.'" She chuckled.

"Oh my." Edward smirked.

"But it gets better. Everyone in the hall was laughing, and Connie was so mad that she yelled 'Bitch!' and slapped her. Lettie grabbed her textbook and nailed her in the eye as she screamed 'Don't you ever, **ever **hit me again, you pig!' and then the two got into a glorious fight and ended up in detention."  
"Ha ha ha! And how did that end?" Edward asked.

"I left with a few cuts and bruises, but I gave her a black eye, which she had to go to prom with, so I guess you can call it a tie." Charlotte smirked as she finished off her pudding. "But enough about me, what were you like in high school, Mister Nigma?"

"I was the smartest kid in my school, of course. But, no one ever really noticed." Edward said.

"No one?"

"No one. So, nothing really interesting happened to me in my high school years."

"Hmm. I'm sure someone had to of noticed."

"No. Not even the school bullies." He frowned.

"Well, I'm sure I would have noticed..." She said as she went to go throw her styrofoam tray and cup in the trash.

He just stared at her, wide eyed. He wasn't sure how to take that. _"Why is she always flattering me?"_ he thought. _"Could it be that someone finally realizes me for the true genius that I am?" _How he hoped that was true.

"I wouldn't trust her, you know." Keiko told Edward as she picked at her peas nonchalantly.

"Why not?" He glared her in the eye, studying her facial expression.

"She's never this nice on her medications. At least, not sincerely. She's playing you like a fiddle." She smiled.

"I think you're lying." He glared. She made him uneasy, this was the first time he had ever seen her smile, **ever**. And this was not a friendly smile.

"Am I really?" She glared back.

As he was glaring down Keiko, he noticed something in the corner of his eye, and turned his head over to check it out.

"What is it?" Keiko said as she turned her head too. "Oh, it's **her**." She got up and walked over, and Edward quickly followed.

"Oh, **god**! Tell me another one!" Charlotte screeched through her laughter.

"I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But then it hit me!" the woman said.

"Ah, sounds just like you, Harley." Charlotte said as she abruptly calmed down. "I've heard that one before."

"Here, Harleen, let **me **show you how it's done." Edward said. "Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all **right** now."

The two blondes broke out into clumsy laughter.

"You like puns?" Edward asked.

"No." Charlotte's face fell dead serious. "I don't **like **puns. I **love **them!" She smiled. " Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda?" she giggled. "He was lucky it was a **soft** drink!" She chortled.

"What?" He said as a stupid smile crept up onto his face.

"Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I'm excited to see how they **turn **out!" Charlotte screeched.

Harley couldn't contain herself, she was in tears and pounding on the table as she roared with laughter.

"That's-" He was trying to keep his cool and prevent his smile from growing bigger. "... Okay. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat says to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a **head**.'"

"You guys are busting my gut!" Charlotte cackled as she grasped on to her stomach, trying not to wheeze.

"Here, you'll like this one. The magician got so mad, that he pulled his **hare** out." He said. He couldn't get enough of her reactions, he was loving this.

"Okay!" Charlotte cackled. "That's enough! Please!" She cried out, trying to grab a hold of some breath. "Ah. Those were fun."

"And what are you guys braying over?" A green woman asked as she took a seat at the table. "I even saw **you **trying to hold back laughter, Edward."

"They were laughing over some stupid puns. Such a shocker." Keiko said.

"Ya shoulda seen us, Pammy! Little Lettie and I were exchanging puns and good old Eddie decided to join in!" Harley said. "...Do ya think Mistah J would have been proud?"

"Oh, Harley. If only you could see how much he walks all over you." Ivy said.

"He does not! ... Does he?" Harleen asked.

"Honey, he treats you like a punching bag." Charlotte frowned. In a way, she felt kind of bad for Harley. The way she saw it, poor Harley was too blinded by her love to really notice how awful the Joker treats her. She thought it was kind of pitiful, really. It reminded her why she typically stood her distance from not only men, but humans in general.

"So, how is Gotham City's Lovely Little Looney? It's been a while since we've spoken." Ivy said.

"Eh. I'm fine." Charlotte said.

"Funny, you don't sound too enthusiastic." Ivy replied.

"Well... I'm kind of in a jam." Charlotte said as she pointed around her surroundings.

"I'm surprised the three of you haven't broken out yet."

"We're full of surprises."

"Did you hear about the 'party' that the Joker is going to throw?" Keiko asked.

"Yes. I heard it was going to be held for Harley. Her birthday is coming up soon, after all." Ivy answered.

"It's only three days away!" Harley said.

_"We should bust out soon then." _Charlotte thought. It's not like she hated Harley or anything, but she and Keiko were always cautious around the Joker. Especially when Harley was involved.

_**tap tap tap**_

Charlotte twitched at the feeling of someone tapping on her shoulder. She turned around and to her dismay, it was her guards.

"Ah, well, I've places to be." She said, allowing the guards to cuff her. "It was a pleasure talking to you all..." She softly spoke as her guards escorted her out.

* * *

**_A/N: I'm not even sorry for those puns. (Actually, I kind of am, don't hate me please.)_**

**_UPDATE: Reformatted~_**


	9. You Have a Visitor

"You two know the visitation rules. No touching, no yelling, and no disrespect. Charlotte, you've only used up 30 minutes of your monthly 4 hours, and therefore have 3 hours and 30 minutes left." Her guard, William, said. "However, you can only spend a maximum of an hour during each session. Use your time wisely."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can leave now." She said as she shooed him off.

"So, Charlotte, how have things been?" The tall, lanky man asked. He was covered head to toe in tattoos and various piercings. He had short and shaggy brown hair, accompanied with stubble. He had bright blue irises, contrasting with the red bloodshot veins that flooded the rest of his eyes. He was a bit muscular, but also looked a bit malnourished and unhealthy. His very presence was irritating Charlotte beyond belief.

"What do you want, James?" She asked.

"Whoa, I had no idea that you were that cynical, Lettie."

"I'm surprised you said that, considering we grew up together, Jimbo."

"Well, you were always the nerd of the family, little sis."

"Ha! If that's what you want to call it." She laughed. The thought of her family being an actual "family" amused her.

"Hey, mom tried." He defended. "She wasn't that bad of a mom. Not as bad as **your ** worthless little drunken leprechaun of a father."

"Our mother was a good for nothing tramp. She was always stealing, drinking, and high on something. Always constantly bringing strange men into the house... Never for long. Yeah, she was **great**. At least my father actually **tried **to make a living, no matter how poor he was. ... It's sad that he wasted his life trying to woo such a vile woman..." She scornfully spit out.

"... Whatever." He rolled his eyes. "She's back, y'know."

"... **What**?" She was honestly hoping that he was lying.

"You heard me, she's back. Mom is back from her little fiasco from Mexico."

"What do you mean she's back? When did she come back? Why the **hell **is she back?!" She exclaimed. To her chagrin, he was telling the truth. And, truth be told, she hated her mom. The two could never stand each other. But, it's not like they didn't have their reasons... "... She should have stayed wherever she decided to run off to. Everything will be better if it stays that way."

"How could you even say that?" James asked. "Mom is back because she wants to make amends with **all **of us... Or at least the ones that are left."

"Please... **don't **bring **that **up. Not ever again." She whispered out as she softly rested her hands over her eyes. "I'm already stressed out enough as it is, especially now that mom's back. **Please **don't bring that up."

"Stop being so melodramatic, Beaver. What happened, happened. It's all in the past. Get over it. It was your stupid boyfriend's fault, anyways." He shrugged.

"That's not nice..." She whimpered, slowly covering the gap in her front teeth with her hand. "... You know why I don't like that nickname..."

"Well... I'm sorry..." He softly apologized. "I miss Danny too, y'know? But, he would have wanted us to move on, and y'know that." He softly assured.

"... What are you doing?" She asked.

"What do you mean 'What are you doing?' I'm trying to be a good brother and console you."

"So after a lifetime of torturing me, and nearly two years of just ignoring me, you decide to pop up out of nowhere and comfort me?"

He sat there in silence, with his head lowered.

"So, if you were flat-out ignoring me, and you suddenly know of my whereabouts, then that means... Oh my **god**. You're dating Erwen again, aren't you?"

"What? That's ridiculous!" He shouted.

"Oh? I bet you've been living in our condo with her too!" She yelled as she pointed her finger at him.

"And what makes you say that?!"

"Oh **please**, you might as well just admit it. I can **smell **her fancy organic body wash from here. What is that anyways? I'm getting oranges and cloves and..." she leaned in a bit and sniffed loudly, "... and vanilla?"

"It is **not**!" He blushed. "... But maybe I have been living in your condo..." He pouted as he folded his arms.

"That's disgusting!" She grimaced. "You better not of hurt any of our pets, or I'll have Koko go Hulk on you."

"Pfft, I'm not scared of your weird, muscular, Japanese friend. I've got a few guns of myself!" He said as he flexed his muscles. She scoffed and rolled her eyes at him.

And right at that moment, the two of them saw the rogues being escorted out of the Mess Hall through the glass window in the room. That included Keiko, Edward, Harley, and Ivy. Keiko scoffed and rolled her eyes at him too, but Edward rose an eyebrow in interest.

"Oh, look, there she is now!" He happily waved at her. Keiko just sneered at him and looked away. "And Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy are lookin' **fine**!"

"Ha ha! But what about when she puts on her gloves? Hmm? Even in her normal state, she'd be tough to beat, even for you. But when she puts on those gloves... she goes full She-Hulk."

"Well... A guy can dream." He smiled. "So... what other rogues have you seen lately?"

"Keiko, of course, is my cell mate. Jonathan used to associate with us, but he was sentenced to solitary confinement recently."

"That's Scarecrow, right?"

"Yes. I just ran into Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn at the Mess Hall."

"Hubba hubba!" He exclaimed. "They're **hot**!"

"I wouldn't let the Joker hear that, if I were you. Supposedly, he's going to break us out and throw a birthday party for Harley, but I'm not sure if it's truth or just another rumor. I've also seen the Mad Hatter, but I don't like him, so I don't talk to him. I've had some run-ins with Two-Face earlier in my stay, but I haven't seen him lately since he's been deemed too crazy to freely run about like a normal inmate. Which is a shame since he can actually be pretty entertaining... But," she leaned in and lowered her voice, "I've also met someone new."

"Who?"

"The Riddler and I have been getting pretty friendly as of late." She smirked.

"I always knew he would take a liking to you. More than the usual man does."

"And why is that?"

"He is a man of mystery, no? And you're the Queen of Confusion, for crying out loud! It would make sense for him try to figure you out. Plus, you're also a mega-nerd, and the guy seems to appreciate that kinda thing."

"Yeah..." she smiled, "I'm pretty sure he has the hots for me." She nodded.

"Ha ha! I'd be careful around him though. He **is **a rogue, after all."

"Why the advice? You never give me advice."

"Well, with the little tricks that you like to play on men's hearts... Even if you don't play them often, I'd bet that you are now. And he seems like a bit of a sore loser, if you ask me..."

She laughed.

"Besides," he said, "Just look at how Music Meister turned out. He heard you sing, he fell in love, you 'played' a 'game' with him, he got hurt, and now he likes to put you into death traps in his spare time."

"Well, it **was** kind of flattering at first, but it's just gotten annoying lately." She giggled.

"My point is, the Riddler is much more smarter and creates more complicated traps. You're good at escaping things, but I'm not too sure how you'd do against him. He might even start getting loved ones involved. See my point?"

"Yes, yes, I see your point. Thing is, I'm pretty sure he's going to try to hurt me too, and you know how I get about these kind of things. You know how competitive I can get, especially when another person engages into a game with me. I might as well get a head start." She explained.

"Ah, Jesus. You **are** mentally ill." He facepalmed. "Just... try not to get hurt. You remember what happened the last time you got into a game like this, all those years ago... How broken up and bitter the **both **of you were."

"... Well, as they say, 'History repeats itself...'" She said in a lowered voice.

"... I've got to go, don't do anything stupid as you wait for the Joker to break you out."

"Ha! I'm going to break out **before **the party. There's no way in **hell **I'm going to have anything to do with the Joker."

"I don't doubt that you'll break out, so... I'll see you soon." He said as he got up and left for the door.

_"Well... that was awkward." _She thought to herself.

* * *

_**Such a nice guy, huh?**_


	10. Know Your Enemy

"Why don't you tell me about yourself as we wait for Lettie to return?" Edward said.

"Me?" Keiko asked.

"Yes, tell me about **you**." He replied.

"Why do you want to learn about **me**? I thought you only cared for Charlotte."

"Is it so wrong to wonder about why she decides to be so close to you? Surely, there must be reasons as to why she does. I want to learn about the only person she really trusts. I want to learn about her only friend. Is that so wrong?"

She shifted around in her seat at the bench, leaning her back on the wall and resting her feet on the rest of the bench.

"Well, then... I'm six feet tall, I'm Japanese, and I have an IQ of 163. I'm asexual, a recovering 'sociopath' supposedly, a schizoid, a professional criminal, and I've been a punk my entire life..." she said, throwing up the sign of the devil with her hand. "I have 6 brothers, all of them are older than me, but I don't think I'd have a problem kicking their ass. I mean, there's a lot... What exactly do you want to learn about me?"

"You already gave me the basics. Why don't you tell me about your childhood, and what the two of you were like as children?"

"I was born here in the States to an upper middle-class family. I was the youngest of seven siblings, and the only female among them. Of course, there was a lot of pressure to be feminine and lady-like from my family, especially since I was the only girl in the family, but I never saw the point in it. I was never girly. Never have been, never will be. Growing up as the youngest, I saw my brothers as fighters. Literally and figuratively. The boys were tough, they didn't take bullshit from people, they were always so cool. They were also taking all sorts of self-defense classes. Karate, Tae Kwon Do, Jiu-jitsu, you name it and one of them was probably learning it. They were always admired for their cool and calm, yet fierce and strong demeanor, and I wanted to be like that. I thought that maybe if I had learned skills like that, that the family would admire me as well, and start paying attention to me too."

"And how did that turn out?"

"Not as I had anticipated, I'll admit that. My brothers never had a problem with it, but my parents did."

"Problems with your parents?"

"You could say that. I was never a bad kid. They didn't always approve of what I did, and would get mad when I tried to learn to fight, but as long as I was docile then I was given whatever I asked for, and this included my self-defense classes. Other than all of the kids in my family, we had a pretty normal life. Dad was a business man, and mom was a typical housewife. Nothing very interesting, until Lettie came into my life, that is."  
"What do you mean? Explain."

"As you know, we met in middle school, specifically in the sixth grade. She was nearly 11 years old and I was nearly 13. The kids in elementary school never paid attention to me. I've always been tall, quiet, and stoic, even back in my elementary years, and those aren't really qualities little kids look for in friends. So, I was always a loner. Not that it bothered me, I never really cared for anyone. I never had a need for friends. Sure, they were amusing and entertaining at times, but no one I'd want to hang out with on a regular basis, you know?" She shrugged.

"Alright, but what about Lettie?"

"As I was saying," she scoffed as she rolled her eyes in contempt, "We met in the A.C.C.C, the Advanced Class for Creative Children. I entered into the program a bit later than everyone else, probably three months or so into the school year. I was assigned to work with Lettie in the chemistry lab, and **good lord**, was she a chatty Cathy when she was younger. I swear to God, she would not shut up throughout the entire duration of the lab, Jesus Christ." She said as facepalmed herself.

"So you were annoyed I take it?" He chuckled.

"Kind of, but it was also a bit flattering. No one had ever really bothered to talk to me, **ever**, and she was the first one to actually come up and try to talk to me. She took my constant nodding and 'mhmms' as a legit conversation and kind of just started following me around everywhere. I was really annoyed back then, but I look back now and it was actually really cute." She grinned. "She sort of just assumed we were friends, and started following me around... I eventually became involved in the shenanigans she'd create with her brothers, and she grew on me, and... Well, we've been best friends since then."

"I see. Why did she grow on you? She sounds fairly annoying as a child, and you don't seem to like very many people. So, why her?"

"She and her brothers were wild. I mean, they would run around doing horrible things and pulling sick pranks, the entire town was horrified of them, and **that** was something that I could respect. For example, her and her oldest brother, James, were **serious **pyromaniacs. They liked to run around and start little fires and blow up mailboxes, and her other brother, Daniel, would always join in. I think they've largely grown out of their pyromania, but Lettie still has a knack for setting things on fire and using explosives when we pull heists or plot against the Dork Knight."

"Ha ha! So, she had a bit of spunk back as a child, eh?"

"She still does. Anyways, back to my story. I don't want to bore you with the mundane details, so I'll just skim over a bit. Me and Lettie stayed as friends throughout middle school, Erwen joined us in seventh grade and we sort of formed this little trio that stuck together. The A.C.C.C. was largely a middle school program, so we took the standard classes, and since it was basically just review for us, we all decided to try to graduate early. Which we did, of course. Not that it takes much brain to graduate early in the first place, but we handled it much easier than most would have, I think."

"How early?"

"A year and a half. So, we graduated by the end of the first semester of the eleventh grade. The A.C.C.C. provided college courses during high school, which counted for our elective credits, and also as actual courses, so we got the certificates and everything. After graduating, Me and Erwen continued taking college courses at the state university of South Dakota until we looked around for better colleges on the internet and we stumbled across the site for the university here at Gotham, and the two of us decided to transfer there. Lettie, of course, followed us. I was 23, Erwen was 22, and Lettie was 21 when we bought our one way tickets, hopped on the bus, and didn't look back. The three of us all attended college there, but Lettie was eventually kicked out. Four years later, me and Lettie decide to start running around in costumes, pull bank heists and robberies, and just generally harass the population of Gotham. Three more years, and... here we are."

"Such an interesting story. But, I've two questions left. Since it doesn't sound like Lettie went straight to college, what did she do after her graduation? And why did she get kicked out of Gotham's university?" He asked her.  
"I've already told you my story, and plenty about her for one day. She'd be mad if I spilled the beans on topics like that. They're very **important **durations of her life, things she wouldn't want most people to know. You'll have to get that information from **her**. It is her story, after all."

"Very well... I'm sure it won't be **too **hard. Although I wouldn't mind the challenge."

"Trust me, she'll give you a hell of a challenge." She smiled.

"That's good..." He smirked.

* * *

They marched in uniform steps as their guards transported them from the Mess Hall back to their cells. Their loud stomps echoed in the hallway. Edward saw that Keiko sneered and abruptly looked away from something coming from inside the window of the visitation room. He turned his head out of curiosity and raised his brows at what he saw. It was Charlotte, grimacing from how utterly disgusted she was with the man in front of her.

The man was muscular, heavily tattooed, and had multiple piercings. He was wearing a simple wife beater and some worn blue jeans. His hair, just like Charlotte's, was slightly disheveled. But other than that, he didn't see any resemblance between the two. The man had brown hair, and Charlotte had blonde hair. The man had blue eyes, and Charlotte had green eyes. The man was tall, and Charlotte was short.

_"What an interesting sight." _he thought to himself as he passed the window. _" An old flame, perhaps? Or maybe an old friend? This will make for an interesting conversation starter for the next time I see her."  
_

* * *

**_A/N: I tried a different format, and I like it better, so I'll probably go back and reformat all the previous chapters when I go to check for errors again. _**


	11. Keeping Score

"I saw James earlier today in the visitation room." Charlotte said.

"I know. I saw him in there when we were being transported back to our cells." Keiko replied as she was bouncing a small ball off their cell wall.

"Could you believe him? He has the nerve to come and talk to me after **two** years of silence, especially after what he did to me." She pouted.

"Oh, grow up. **You **were the one who overreacted. Erwen and James are free to date whomever they want, and that includes each other. Until they broke up, that is."

"They're back together."

"... What?"

"I'm pretty damn sure he's living at our condo too."

"... **What**!?"

"I smelled her hemp body wash on him. So I'm pretty sure they've been sleeping together. Or rather, showering together."

"**Ugh**! Why'd you have to say that?! Gah!" Keiko yelled as she cringed from disgust. Her ball bounced pass her.

"Gross... Isn't it?" Charlotte said as she caught the ball. She happily bounced it up and down. She started bouncing it across the room, playing a miniature game of handball by herself.

_**PLONK**_

Charlotte flinched from the sudden noise. Keiko had grabbed the ball right out of the air.

"... **My **ball." Keiko said, waving the ball in front of her.

"So be it..." Charlotte replied with a smile. Her eyes shot wide open with horror when she looked out the glass wall and down into the hall. "**Quick**! Hide it! Hide it!"

"What?" Keiko asked, completely and utterly confused.

"Hide. The. **Ball**!" Charlotte said as she grabbed the ball from Keiko's hands. "We need to hide it!" She yelled as she stuffed it inside her pillow.

"What the f-" And suddenly Keiko understood. She saw guards appearing out of nowhere, preparing for surprise inspections for the rogues' cells. They scrambled about, rummaging things into order and hastily making their beds. They knew the penalties for not keeping their cell tidy, and they didn't want to have to deal with the asylum's oppression.

_**psshhh**_

They heard the air tight door opening and hurriedly got into their positions.

"Hello ladies. How are you two enjoying your stay?" One of the guards asked.

The two of them remained silent.

"I see... Search 'em, boys." He said.

Guards scattered around the room, searching every crevice, every crack for anything that might of been hidden.

"Are you... **Nervous**!?" He yelled into Keiko's face. No response from her, she remained cold and stoic as usual.

"I see..." He walked over to Charlotte. "And what about **you**, Miss Dunne?_*****_ What secrets are **you **hiding from **me**?" He asked as he slowly stroked her cheek. She was hating this. First of all, she disliked being touched. No, scratch that. She **hated **being touched, period. Especially when it was like that. Secondly, the stress of them possibly finding the ball was eating away at her. It may sound stupid, but she knows the penalty for keeping unauthorized objects in your cell. Solitary confinement for a week. That's right, solitary confinement for an entire **friggin** week. She couldn't bear the thought of being alone without Keiko in the asylum for a week. Not even for a day.

Her heart started racing when they finally got to the beds. They ripped the sheets off and shook the mattress vigorously. Nothing came out. They grabbed their pillows and unsheathed them from their pillowcases.

"What's wrong, Miss Dunne? Is there something in the pillow?" He asked as he grabbed it and shook it with all his might. Nothing came out.

He circled around the room he and his men ripped up, and then around the two girls.

"Well then... You two have been good girls... Keep it up." He smiled as he and the guards left the cell.

She let out a loud sigh of relief.

"Goodness gracious... I don't know **how** you do it, Koko." She said.

"What do you mean?" Keiko asked, fixing the sheets to her bed.

"How you remain so cold and emotionless all the time."

"You did a good job keeping calm. I'm surprised you didn't have a panic attack."

"Ha ha ha! Me too..." Charlotte sadly laughed as she got to work on her bed. "And to think all that trouble was just to find a ball."

Keiko peered down the hall.

"Are they gone?" Charlotte asked.

"No, they're entering Eddie's room down the hall." Keiko snickered.

"You really don't like him, do you?" Charlotte smiled.

"Nope."

"But you like Jonathan more?"

"He's okay I guess."

"And why is that?" Charlotte tilted her head at Keiko.

"I dunno. Jonathan is more respectable, I guess. Edward is sketchy. I don't like him. He seems to have more malicious intents than Jonathan does... You like him, don't you?" Keiko sadly asked.

"Which one?"

"You know damn well who I'm talking about. **Edward**. I always saw you picking up the papers whenever he was making headlines. And that's... unusual."

"And why do you say that?"

"You don't give a shit about celebrities or current events. That's too mundane for you. So, why else would you pick up the papers? Especially when they have his name and face plastered all over the front page?"

"... I just have a fascination, is all. He **is **an interesting man..." She smiled. "You'd be more comfortable with Jonathan, I take it?"

"Yeah."

"I do like Jonathan, I really do, but Jonathan would probably be more likely to hurt me, with his fascination with phobias and all." Charlotte said.

"You know... I'm pretty sure the two of them are just using you." Keiko frowned.

"You think I don't know?" Charlotte replied, taking a seat on her bunk.

"You **know**? And you're still permitting this to happen?"

"If I provides us with entertainment, then hey, why not?" She shrugged. "I was the one who started it in the first place."

"What do you mean?" Keiko asked.

"Well, I know that Jonathan has always taken an interest in me because of my long list of unusual phobias, and I also know that Edward has taken interest in me because of my secretive nature." She explained. "I knew that if I could get them together, that they'd want to play a game together to ease their boredom during their stay in the asylum. See?"

"So... **You're **the one who did the manipulating?"

"At first, yes. But, although I'm aware of the manipulative moves they've used and are going to use in the future, I'm just going to patiently sit back and enjoy the sight of them driving each other mad. I'll have fun keeping score." She said as she lied herself down on her bunk. "Hopefully they'll turn into enemies and can be used against each other in the future." She grinned.

"You **are **evil, Lettie!" Keiko smiled.

"Thank you, I know." Charlotte smiled back.

"They just left his cell."

"And?" She turned her head to Keiko.

"He looks **pissed**. His cell is a goddamn mess, it's even worse than ours was." Keiko giggled.

"Aw, poor Eddie." Charlotte smiled.

"I bet it's gonna take him forever to clean it up." Keiko laughed.

"Probably..." She said. "And... lights out!" she exclaimed as she snapped her fingers. The lights all shut off.

"Ha! Eddie's not going to be able to clean up because of the dark!" Keiko laughed. "... I have no idea how you know when the lights are going off without a clock." Keiko said, trying to find her way into her top bunk in the dark.

"I just have a good internal clock, I guess." Charlotte replied, pulling her covers over her.

"Yeah, well it's creepy sometimes." Keiko said.

"Goodnight, Koko!" she sing-songed out.

"Goodnight, Lettie." Keiko replied.

"See you tomorrow, Koko." Charlotte yawned.

"Hm. See you tomorrow, Lettie."

* * *

_**A/N: *I'll explain this soon ;)**_


	12. Horsing Around

_**A/N: Just thought that I'd let you guys know that there's a bit of cursing in this chapter, so I hope I don't offend too many of you!**_

* * *

"So," Edward said, taking a seat at the lunch table and setting his tray down, "Who was that dashing young man you were talking to yesterday? Somebody... special?"

"I guess one could say that." Charlotte said, before taking a spoonful of her pudding.

"Someone important in your life?"

"Oh, he's **very **important to my life. Whether I like it or not..."

"I didn't know you had such an interesting taste in men, Lettie."

"Well, I think you'd be surprised about the kinds of men that I've dated over the years, Mister Nigma..." She said, slowly spacing out. "But..." she snapped back, "that's not important right now, and neither is he."

"So, how old is this man?" He asked, trying to get her back to the subject. "He can't be **that **old since you're still a fairly young lady."

"... I'm sure he's a bit younger than you are, but not by much." She smiled. "Trying to find out about my dating cutoff age for men?"

He smirked.

"He's not much older than me, but I wouldn't worry about age if I were you. Not that you'd have to." She said.

"So then, what **is **your dating cutoff age for men?" He asked as he raised his eyebrow.

"I'd say 38, I suppose."

"You suppose?"

"Well, how old are **you**, Mister Nigma?" She said, scanning him. "If I knew your age, then maybe I'd have a better idea."

"Ha ha! I'm well before your cutoff age, I assure you."

"Excellent..." She grinned.

"What are you two talking about?" Keiko asked, setting her food tray on the table.

"He was asking about James." Charlotte answered.

"James? That idiot? What about him?"

"I was wonder who he was. He seems like an **interesting **fellow." Edward said.

"Oh, he **is **an interesting fellow." Keiko teased.

"Yes, a **very **interesting fellow." Charlotte smirked as she finished off her pudding.

"His name is James?" Edward asked.

"Jimbo and her go way back." Keiko said.

"Do you?" He leaned in as he asked Charlotte.

"We do. I've known him since we were children. We used to be** very** close. We remained close up until early adulthood." Charlotte said.

"How close? Do you mean as in..." He moved his hands suggestively.

"Oh **God**!" Keiko broke out into laughter. "Just tell him, Lettie!"

"He's my big brother. My oldest brother, to be more precise." Charlotte answered.

"... You two don't look alike, though." He stared at her, examining her features and mentally comparing them to James'.

"It's because he's my **half **brother. We have the same mother, but not the same father. Our fathers looked differed greatly in appearance. For example, his father was tall, and mine was... well, he was short!" She laughed.

"That makes sense..." He said, trailing off into his thoughts. "How many siblings do you have?"

"Two older brothers, two younger brothers, and a baby sister." She recounted. "Or, at least she **was **a baby before I left."

"So six children in total. Although Jimbo was always the dumb muscle." Keiko said, dipping her tater tots into her ketchup.

"Was he ever!" Charlotte agreed.

"Was he?" Edward asked.

"Well, if we're speaking honestly, he **still **is." Charlotte giggled.

"Ha ha! I heard he was a pyromaniac as a child." He said.

"We used to set things on fire as children." She chuckled. "As you could imagine, not very many people in our town liked us. That's fine, I suppose. I never cared for many of them anyways."

"And why is that?"

"They were all so **dull** and **ordinary**. Nothing special, nothing interesting... One has to be interesting to catch **my **eye." She winked at him.

He smiled back with amusement. He was really beginning to enjoy this woman and her antics, whether they were genuine or not. Why would that matter to him in the first place, since he practically had her wrapped around his finger, right? After all, she was just an interesting pawn to the game he was playing with Jonathan. Which, judging by her actions towards him, he was winning. Just an amusing puzzle that he got to play with to patiently bide his time with in the asylum. Or at least that's what he thought.

"Are you going to eat the rest of your food, Lettie?" Keiko asked Charlotte.

"No. Why, would you like it?" Charlotte responded as she handed her plate to Keiko.

"No."

"Well why not?"

"Because **you **need to eat."

"Bah! I'm full." Charlotte said, crossing her arms and facing away.

"All you ate was your pudding! At least eat your tater tots. This batch actually seems fresh."

"... No." She smiled.

"Eat your food."

"**No**. Stop asking me."

"I'm not **asking**, I'm **telling **you. Eat your damn food!"

"**No**! Stop trying to make me!" Charlotte yelled.

"Damn you, Lettie! Stop being a stubborn ass and eat your fucking food!"

"You can't make me!" She sang.

"You ass! Eat it!"

Charlotte let out an exasperated sigh.

"Okay! You got me! I'll eat it." Charlotte said, grabbing a tater tot.

"... Really?" Keiko glared.

"Nope." Charlotte tossed the tater tot high into the air. She threw a concerned look on her face as she put a hand on Keiko's shoulder. "I lied. I'm sorry that I lied to you." She said as her voice started cracking. Tears welled up in her eyes. "Do you think you could forgive me?"

"**FUCKER**!" Keiko yelled as she caught the tater tot and shoved it into her mouth.

"Oh! Gross!" Charlotte cringed as she spat it out. "Agh! Why the hell would you do this to **me**?!"

"You two!" They heard someone yell.

"Eh?" Charlotte questioned as they all turned their heads.

"Quit it, missy!" The guard yelled as he grabbed Keiko.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?" Charlotte glared.

"Miss Fukayama here assaulted you. And she knows damn well what the penalty for assault is." He said, cuffing Keiko. "Solitary confinement for a **month**!"

"It was hardly an assault! We were just horsing around!" Charlotte defended.

"It's still assault." He said as he cuffed Keiko.

"How the hell is solitary confinement supposed to help a mentally ill person in the first place?!"

"Look **woman**, one more word out of your cock sucker and it'll be solitary confinement for you too! Are we clear?"

She slowly nodded as he took Keiko away. She took her seat back at the lunch table.

"... I don't like him." She sneered as she bitterly toyed around with her tater tots.

"And what are you going to do about it?" Edward asked.

"We'll see. I'll think of something. I'll get him eventually. And it **wont **be a pretty sight." She grinned.

_"Such an amusing woman." _He thought as he grinned back.

* * *

_**A/N: Poor Keiko :(**_


	13. You're Late!

_"That idiot." _She silently thought to herself. _"She's always getting me in trouble with her childish antics."_

She remained huddled in the only dry corner there was. The asylum typically didn't send inmates to solitary confinement that often, so they never felt the need to keep up with scheduled repairs. They saw it more as a bonus since the only people they ever sent there were the rogues. It was very dim, and it would have been hard to differentiate objects if it weren't for how small the old dinky cell was. The sheets were filthy, and their odors were strong enough to make anybody miserable. The walls were made of brick, and the only opening was that of the oblique, narrow window on the steel door.

_"Well... She didn't mean for this to happen... She's probably being eaten alive by her own guilt right now..." _Keiko reasoned with herself.

_"I hope she'll be okay in her cell, all alone... she hates being alone. God, I hope she doesn't get any anxiety attacks." _She thought. She worried about Charlotte too much, she really did. And she knew that.

_"I need to stop worrying... She's a grown person, and she knows I'll be able to take care of myself. She should be fine! ... Right?"_

She shifted from her fetal position and stretched out her legs.

_"Maybe I can work out a bit. Oh! I should stretch out first!" _

She got up and rested her foot on the wall mounted bed. She tried doing a forward lunge on it when-

_**SNAP!**_

The chains holding up the bed snapped out of the wall, and the board of the bed fell, hanging limp from the wall.

_"... Shit..."_

* * *

_"Oh God... This is all my fault..." _She thought to herself. It had already been a couple of days since Keiko was taken into solitary confinement. The guilt of it was eating away at Charlotte. Her best friend was stuck in a dark, damp cell and it was all because of her.

She anxiously tapped on the side of her bunk.

**_tap tap tap tap_**

She grabbed Keiko's sheet and wrapped it around her in a hooded fashion, and huddled herself in the corner.

"I don't want to be a legend. Oh! Well that's a God damned lie! I do!"  
To say I do this for the people, I admit is hardly true..."

She sadly sang to herself. She usually didn't care much for Keiko's weird music, but she felt like it was appropriate to sing them in remembrance of her. She quickly got up and started pacing around her cell.

_"I hope she isn't too mad at me..." _She thought to herself. _"Oh God..." _She thought to herself. The lights flickered out, and she was all alone in the dark cell. _"Oh **God**!" _She thought again.

Her heart was racing, and she started breaking out into a cold sweat. Was she trembling, or was she just shivering from the cold? She started pacing around faster, hurriedly trying to quicken her steps.

_"I bet she hates me right now." _

Tears started to slowly stream from her eyes. Her breath became heavier with each inhalation, and it was getting hard for her body to properly intake oxygen.

_"Am I having... an anxiety attack?" _She thought as she slowed down and took her pulse.

_"Okay, slow down, Lettie. Sit down on the bunk." _She thought as sat herself down in the middle of the bunk and hooded herself again.

_"Inhale deeply..." _She took a deep, deep breath. _"Now exhale. Let it all out." _She exhaled.

_"Good, now let's repeat that, but try it slower this time." _She slowly took a deep breath, and then slowly let it out.

_"Repeat, but even slower this time. And pat on your knees." _She slowly patted on her knees as she tried to regulate her breathing.

_"Okay, now open your eyes." _She opened up her eyes and lied herself down in her bed.

"Ah... I'm so pathetic sometimes..." she softly said as she traced one of her fingers along the wall.

* * *

The asylum had abolished Games and Recreations due to a tight budget. Plus, they didn't really remember why it would be a good idea to let some of the most arrogant and egotistical rogues of Gotham play games against each other. It was just a recipe for disaster, really.

"What are you doing down there?" Edward asked.

"Just basking in the shade." Charlotte responded. "Care to join me?" She asked, patting the grass next to her.

Jonathan and Keiko were still locked up in solitary confinement, so it was just Edward and Charlotte left to try to entertain themselves. Harley and Ivy weren't let outside for obvious reasons. Harley was too likely to try to smuggle plant life back into their cell, and what would never be a good thing.

It was really crowded today. There were inmates left and right, breaking out into fights constantly. It was a busy day for the guards.

He got down from the bench and sat down next to her.

"Scared to lie down next to me? Most men would kill to be in your position!" She teased.

"Not at all. I just don't want to dirty my uniform too much is all." He said.

Silence fell.

"What is love to you?" He asked.

"Love?"

"Yes, love?"

She shifted around a bit, and then sat up.

"Well, I obviously believe in platonic love, seeing as how that's the relationship Koko and I have... But, romance varies amongst couples."

"Such as? Please, elaborate a bit. Do you think you're capable of love?"

"I have **once**. After all, love and companionship is a biological need that **all **humans crave in their life, whether they like it or not..." She frowned. "As for different types of love, well, just look at Disney, and then look at Harley and the Joker."

"And which do you think is more likely?" He grinned.

"Definitely Harley and the Joker." She nodded.

"Ha ha!" He chuckled.

"However..." She got up and sat on the bench next to them, "I know that when I love someone, I become completely and utterly devoted to them, and I become full of admiration and adoration for that person... If that answers your question."

He tilted his head and stared at her, examining all of her features. A calm face with crossed legs, but crossed arms? _"She's trying to look calm, but is actually incredibly tense?" _He thought. He got up and sat next to her. _"That's not exactly a very positive reaction to a conversation on emotional intimacy." _He smirked.

"And what about you, Mister Nigma? What is love to you?" She grinned.

"A waste of time."

"Oh? How come?"

"Well, as you mentioned earlier, Harley and the Joker are an excellent example. The two of them are incredibly destructive towards each other in their relationship, and why would I want that? Why would I want to waste my time on somebody who would do nothing but hurt me? It's just not logical, now is it?"

"You're right."

"Now tell me..." his smirk grew wider, "what is your opinion on lust?"

"Ooh, on **lust**? Well..." she said as she leaned back, "... Although it's largely pointless, it's still an interesting game."

"An interesting **game**?" He grinned, turning to her.

"Yes... a **very **interesting game." She smiled.

"You're late, Duchess!" Jervis cried out as he ran over to the both of them. "And you too, March Hare!"

"What the...?" She said as she away from Edward. "What do you mean we're late?"

_"Damn it..." _Edward pouted.

"We're all late! So, so late!" He screeched. "And the Joker! He's... he's late!"

Whistles were sounding off everywhere. It was time to go back inside.

"Well, I'll be seeing you boys later..." She said as she wandered off in search for her guards.

"... You just had to interrupt us, didn't you?" Edward complained.

"The Joker, he's **late**!" Jervis whispered loudly.

Edward let out and exasperated sigh.

"Yes, yes, we're all late..." He said as his thoughts slowly trailed off.

* * *

_**A/N: They're late! So very late!**_


	14. Presents and Cake

Another week had passed. Harley was heartbroken because the Joker never came for her. It was just a rumor after all.

"My puddin' never came! Ah!" She sobbed into Charlotte's shoulder.

"Here," Charlotte said, pushing her pudding towards Harley, "You can have **my **pudding."

"Ah!" She squealed sadly. "I don't want your puddin'! Eddie's all yours!"

"What the hell, I was talking about my actual pudding cup." Charlotte defended.

Edward cackled loudly.

"But since you were too slow to realize that, I think I'll just keep it for myself." Charlotte said, ripping the top off. "Aww, vanilla!" She grunted.

"You don't like vanilla?" Edward asked.

"I'd rather have chocolate pudding." Charlotte replied.

"**Ah**!" Harley cried even louder.

"Jesus!" Charlotte cringed in pain as she covered her ear. "Look Harley," she slowly removed Harley from her shoulder, "I'm sure he just didn't want to through the trouble of getting through Arkham security. I mean really, can you blame him?"

Harley just sat there wide-eyed with her mouth dropped. She looked like she was in agonizing pain.

"**AHHH**!" Harley cried even louder. Charlotte was never very good at the whole "consoling" thing.

"God damn!" She covered her hears again.

"Here, let me try something." Edward said as he got up from his seat.

"What are you doing?" Charlotte asked.

He walked over to their side of the bench and wedged himself between the two girls.

"It's a tight fit, but it'll have to do." He said, pulling his lunch tray towards him.

"Like you really have a problem with that." She teased, sipping on her juice.

"Well, I don't see **you **protesting either, Lettie." He teased back.

She scooted over a bit.

"Are you?" He asked her, giving off a slight sneer.

"That'd be absurd. I just like personal space." She shrugged. She started picking at her tater tots.

"You're eating now?" Edward raised his brow at her.

"Yes. I should at least eat my tater tots. How else am I going to keep up my strength?" She replied.

"Or is it because Keiko told you to?"

"... How did you know?" She looked down and smiled as she picked at them more.

"You feel like you're honoring her request. You feel like it's an appropriate thing to do after you caused misfortune for her. You probably feel like it's the least you can do." He said, his smirk growing.

"... Yes..." She said in a lowered voice, taken back with amazement. _"How did he know?" _She thought. _"No one has ever been able to guess why I do the things I do. Why him?" _

In a way, she kind of liked it. Somebody actually understood why she was doing something. Sure, she may be the Queen of Chaos, but even she likes it when people understand her time from time. Which was pretty much never, to her chagrin.

Her guards tapped on her shoulder.

"Time to see your shrink, Miss Dunne." Her guard said.

"Ah, very well." She said, allowing them to cuff her. "I'll see you two later."

* * *

"How are the meds working out for you, Charlotte?" Dr. Carmichael asked her.

"They're all good, Penny. No disordered thoughts, I'm having an easier time keeping neat..." Charlotte replied.

"That's great! But please, Charlotte, keep it professional. Call me Dr. Carmichael."

"Whatever you say, Penny." Charlotte said, playing with the candies in the dish on the coffee table.

"How's your anxiety?" She asked, rolling her eyes.

"Why do you have a coffee table if you don't set your coffee on it?" Charlotte asked, looking up at her.

"What?"

"Why. Do. You. Have. A. Coffee. Table-" She slowly enunciated.

"I don't know, it was there when I got here." Dr. Carmichael said, squeezing on her pen. "Please, get up off the floor and sit in the chair."

"The floor is so much comfier than that old, nasty chair though!" She cheered.

"It will help me focus if you do sit up there." The Doctor said.

"Well then, whatever you say." She smiled. She got up, and sat on the very top of the head cushion, and rested her feet on the cushion seat.

"... What are you doing?"

"Oh, just sitting up here, you know. It didn't make much sense to me, but Doctor's orders!" Charlotte replied.

"Please, **sit **in the cushion seat." The Doctor clenched even tighter onto the pen.

"Well, okay. If you say so." She got up, and sat on the chair upside down.

"Charlotte!"

"Yes?" She sang as she started swinging her head back and forth.

"**Sit** in the seat right-side up." She said through her teeth.

"Gosh, and people say I'm confusing..." Charlotte murmured as she huddled up in the chair.

"Feet on the floor."

She skidded her feet forward a little.

"Feet on the **floor**." Dr. Carmichael repeated, but this time, it was more sternly.

She skidded her feet just a little bit more, so now her heels were letting her feet hang off the cushion.

"Okay. Now **drop**." Her doctor gritted through her teeth.

She happily slid out of her chair and sat back down on the floor.

"Now we're back to where we started!" Her doctor screeched.

"I know! Isn't that funny? If you just wanted me to sit on the floor, you should have said so from the beginning!" She exclaimed.

"**Okay**! Session's over!" The Doctor yelled, opening the door for her. "Robert! William! Get her back to her cell!"

"What did you do this time, Charlotte?" Her guard, Robert, asked.

"I don't even know!" She cried out. "I did every little thing that she asked me to do! Could you believe that..."

Dr. Carmichael just rolled her eyes as she shut the door behind her, and got to writing a report on her progress.

* * *

_**TAP TAP. TAP TAP TAP.**_

She sat there, tapping on her knees rhythmically to the beat of the music playing in her mind.

"... And it's all mine, oh. Oh whoa!  
Do what you want but you're never gonna break me!  
Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me! Oh. Oh oh oh!

Take me away! A secret place! A sweet escape! take me away!  
Take me away to better days! Take me away, a hiding place!"

_"I already am in a hiding place..." _She thought to herself as she sadly laughed.

_"I fucking hate that song." _She giggled.

She got up and started running her fingers along the bars of the bunks.

___"Thank **God **that these cells are sound proof." _

She quickly turned her head when she heard the creaking cell door open.

_"What the hell do they want now?" _

"I've gotten some tips that you've been hiding a ball somewhere in this room." The man said.

_"Oh, it's **him**. The man from the inspection." _She thought.

"And who told you that? I've got no balls in here." She replied.

"I heard they were in the pillow..." He said as he walked over there.

"You're not going to find anything in there, you know. Even if I **was **hiding something, do you think I'd really be as stupid as to keep it in the same place?" She mocked as he was ripping out the stuffing.

"Wait a second..." He said, giving it some thought.

"I told you, it's not in there. There's no ball in this room."

"How about in the mattress?"

"Oh, you're smart. Like I'd want you to tear up the beds?"

"... No..." He said, squinting at her chest.

"... What are you doing?" She said, covering her chest.

"Is it just me, or are one of your breasts slightly bigger than the other one, Miss Dunne?" He asked, raising his brows and grinning from excitement.

"**What**?!" She blushed. "How inappropriate!"

He started approaching her.

"Oh **no **you don't!" She exclaimed as she ran for the door.

He charged after her, and tackled her down in the hall.

"GET OFF OF ME!" She shrieked!

"Didn't get far, now did you? Now... lets see what you're hiding underneath." He said, unbuttoning the top of her jumpsuit.

"NO! NO! NO! NO!" She yelled as she squirmed around, hitting and kicking him all over.

He shoved his hand down her bra.

"EEEEEEK!" She screamed.

"HA! Thought you could fool me, huh?! You were hiding the ball in your bra all this time!" He declared as he ripped the ball out from her shirt.

"Ughhh..." she mumbled as she squirmed around on the floor. "AH!" She screamed as he flipped her over. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?! I **demand **to know!"

"You know the penalty for smuggling unauthorized objects into your cell. One month of solitary confinement." He explained as he cuffed her hands behind her back.

"... What?"

"And, I'm going to add another month for assault on a guard."

"... **What**?!" She exclaimed. "You **can't**! It's not even my ball! And I'd hardly call it an assault, it was more of a defensive move, you **pervert**!"

"I'll admit," he said, turning her over and leaning in, "I do like them feisty."

"AHHHH!" She shrieked from the top of her lungs.

"Will you shut up?!" He yelled as he raised his baton.

Right as she winced in preparation of the hit-

**_BOOM!_**

There was a sudden boom coming from the distance.

"What was that...? You stay here," he said as he secured her cuffs, "I'm going to go check it out." He said, running off to go see what had happened.

He opened the hallway door and quickly ran back in the hall, but left the hall door open.

"IN THE CELL, IN THE CELL." He urged.

She quickly ran into her cell, and slammed the door shut with her foot. He looked **pissed.** He was pounding on the cell door angrily, trying to force himself in. She couldn't tell what he was yelling, but man, was she getting a kick out of this.

He frantically ran around, banging on all the other rogues' cell doors, and suddenly, it became clear to her.

There was a brightly colored cake running around on wheels. The candle wick, it didn't look anything like a wick. No, that was no candle, and that was no cake. It was a **bomb**.

_**BOOM! **_

It blew him to smithereens! There was confetti everywhere! The blast was so massive, that it actually **cracked **the glass! She tried to squint through the glass, but to no avail.

All the sudden, all of the doors opened up, for all of the rogues' cells.

_"What the hell..." _She thought as she walked out. She poked at the guards' horrible deformed carcass with her foot.

"A bit **tied **up at the moment?" She heard Edward say, walking over to her.

"A bit." She said as she sat down. "Could you hang on a second?"

"Just for a second?" He smiled.

"Yeah, just a second." She said as she slid her hands from underneath her body, so they were in the front of her. He didn't mind waiting. He knew what she was doing. "This shouldn't take me too long..."

She braced the chain with her foot, and squeezed the knuckles on her left hand into a tight circle using her other hand. She slid her left hand out with ease. She grabbed onto her right hand, squeezed it, and slid it out. She smiled as she dangled the cuffs on her finger.

"You know how to escape from handcuffs?" He asked.

"I know how to escape from a **lot **of things." She smirked.

**"HEEEEELLLLOOOOOOOO ROGUES OF** **GOTHAM!" **They heard a voice boom from the intercom.

_"SHIT." _Charlotte thought to herself.

**"SUCH A LOVELY EVENING WE'RE HAVING TODAY! IN FACT, IT'S THE PERFECT EVENING TO THROW A LITTLE PARTY! WHAT A LOVELY COINCIDENCE IT IS THAT I HAPPEN TO BE THROWING ONE RIGHT THIS INSTANCE! SURRRPRIIIIIISSEE HARLEY!"**

"PUDDIN'!" Harley squeeled happily. "Did you hear that, Lettie?"

"No! I **didn't**!" Charlotte snapped. Edward chuckled at Charlotte's sass.

"My puddin' pop didn't forget about me after all!" Harley was estatic! She couldn't stop jumping up and down.

**"PRESENTS AND CAKE ARE IN THE MESS HALL!" **the Joker boomed.

"WEEEEEE!" She yelled as she ran down the hall, headed for the Mess Hall.

"Well then, why don't we join them?" Edward said, extending his hand towards Charlotte.

"... It's not like we have a choice anyways." Charlotte replied, reluctantly taking his hand. He helped her up.

He smirked at her and the two made their merry way to the Mess Hall.

* * *

_**A/N: Harley is just so happy, haha.**_


	15. Happy Birthday, Harley!

"What else can you escape from?" Edward asked Charlotte as they roamed through the halls, searching for the Mess Hall.

"Handcuffs are used on me the most, but straitjackets and zip ties are fun to escape from." She replied.

"Zip ties? Of all the things you could escape from, you pick zip ties? They're so easy!"

"**Exactly**. Most people see them as this huge challenge, when they're really not. It's fun to see people struggling over something so simple, see them falling apart over some stupid zip tie. And then I just come prancing along, and it literally only takes me around 5 seconds to escape from them." She smiled.

"We're here." He said, grinning at her statement.

The Mess Hall was a complete disaster. The streamers were torn, the "HAPPY BIRTHDAY HARLEY" banner was crooked, shreds of wrapping paper were sprawled everywhere, fresh corpses blown to bits from guards and what appeared to be small animals? And the confetti, oh lord, the confetti was caked on everything. The food and beverages were showered in the stuff, and there was so much on the floor, that it looked like there were random patches of fuzzy carpet throughout the room. And was that cake smeared on the wall?

Pretty much all of the rogues were there. At least, the big ones. This included Jonathan, Poison Ivy, Keiko, Two-Face, The Mad Hatter, and Joker even got the Penguin to attend. All of them were wearing small hats. Jonathan's was his a smaller version of his usual, Poison Ivy's was a flower crown, Keiko was wearing a monkey on top of her head, Two-Face wore a small two-toned fedora, The Mad Hatter was wearing his usual oversized top hat (no one dared to come in-between him and his favorite hat), and the Penguin was wearing his usual hat.

"It looks like a piñata threw up in here." Edward held the door open for her.

"I know, isn't it great?" Charlotte said, entering the room. She took a seat at her usual spot. "Aw! Koko! I wish I had a camera! You look so **cute** in that little monkey hat!" She cooed as she pinched onto her cheeks.

"STOP IT." Keiko growled.

"Oh! Koko! I'm just playing!" Charlotte giggled.

"Here's your hats!" Jervis said as he handed Edward and Charlotte small boxes.

"The Mad Hatter handing out little hats at a birthday party?" Charlotte said.

"It fits." Edward said, nodding his head. He opened his box, and took out the small hat from the inside.

"Ha! Yours is a little fuzzy bowler hat!" Charlotte giggled.

He sneered at her.

"Calm down, you look cute." She said as she opened hers up and plopped in on.

"A small cloche? How befitting." He chuckled.

"How do I even put this on properly?" She said as it awkwardly stuck off the side of her head.

"HA!" Keiko laughed at her.

"Hey, at least I don't have a monkey popping out of the top of my head." She laughed back. "Oh! Jonathan!" She said as she ran over to him. "I love your hat!" She giggled as she stood on her tippy toes, trying to pet it.

"It's just like my usual, but smaller." He shrugged.

"Most of these are." She said, pulling on her mini cloche and letting it snap back onto her skull.

"Why is Keiko's a monkey?" He grinned.

**"WELL SINCE SHE USUALLY DOESN'T WEAR ONE, I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE THE SLIGHTEST IDEA AS TO WHICH ONE I SHOULD OF GOTTEN HER!"**

"Ya did a good job, puddin'!" Harley said.

**"AW, YOU THINK SO?!" **The Joker boomed through the microphone.

"Joker, we're right here. Do you think you could turn in down just a bit?" Jonathan asked.

"A party pooper as always, Johnny!" The Joker replied, turning the volume down. "No matter! Shall we move on to the cakes and presents?"

"Let's do it, Mistah J!" Harley said.

**BAM!**

Chunks of the wall flew everywhere! It was an **enormous** birthday cake on wheels! The top of it blew off, and presents erupted from the top, showering everywhere!

"What the hell?!" Keiko yelled as she shielded her face with her arms.

"Wow! Look at that!" Charlotte happily exclaimed. She leaned in towards Keiko, and whispered, "Koko, look at that giant hole in the wall. I say we make a break for it before the Joker pulls any **funny **business."

"Did you seriously just pull that pun?" Keiko asked.

"She saw an opportunity, and she took it." Edward said. "Planning on making your escape?"

"Yes. Although the décor is extravagant and I do love the hat idea, I think it's best to leave before anything horrible happens. Just look at Two-Face and Penguin. We barely just got here and they're already at each others necks!" Charlotte exclaimed.

"And who knows what the Joker **really **has planned." Jonathan added. "Sure, he loves Harley, but this much? I think it's just an excuse to round us up and kill us off. I'm coming too."

"And who invited you, Crane?" Edward scoffed.

"He can come if he wants, Nigma." Keiko scowled.

"You two ladies go first." Edward said. "We'll meet up with you soon."

"I'll meet you boys at the usual place." Charlotte said.

Edward raised his brow at her.

"Jonathan will know what she's talking about." Keiko said.

"See you boys soon." Charlotte smiled as she and Keiko slipped out of the hole.

* * *

The two of them were running in the hallways, running amok. It seemed as if there were no guards to be found anywhere, but they still exercised caution. Better safe than sorry.

"Where is it?" Charlotte grunted.

"The room should be right around that corner, the last one at the hall!" Keiko said, turning that way. She tried opening it. "It's locked! Pick it."

"You got it!" Charlotte said, taking the pin off of her miniature cloche. She bent it around a bit and jammed it into the lock. She jimmied it around until...

**click!**

... the door opened.

"Now, lets see..." Charlotte said, flipping the lights on.

"My gloves!" Keiko said as she smashed the glass to the case and pulled her gloves out. She put them on and pressed their on button. "Oh **yeah**, now we're talkin'." She nodded and grinned at the sound of her gloves powering up.

"Can you get my swords and my apple out of here?" Charlotte said, pointing to her case.

"Damn right I can." Keiko said. She tapped on the glass lightly, and it shattered into tiny bits and pieces.

"Show off!" Charlotte giggled as she put grabbed her two swords. "I missed my babies." She smiled.

"Weirdo." Keiko teased. "How are you gonna get your golden apple out of here?"

"Well," Charlotte said as she strapped her set of throwing knives around her thigh, "I was thinking I could maybe carry it?"

"And what are you going to carry it in? It's a fucking bomb, everyone will know that."

"Lets see what they have in the locker room down the hall."

"The locker room is down the hall?" Keiko asked.

"... Yes." She grinned.

"Fucking idiots, man!" Keiko laughed.

"I know!" Charlotte said as she bolted down the hall. Keiko quickly followed and punched the door down.

"I found a long coat that would be good for hiding your swords and knives." Keiko said, handing it to Charlotte.

"Thanks." Charlotte said as she opened one of the lockers and started stripping down. "Look through the lockers, there **has **to be something for you."

"I already found a change of clothes." Keiko said, ripping off her jumpsuit.

They quickly changed their clothes and strapped their weapons back on.

"Now lets **go**." Keiko urged.

* * *

**A/N: I feel like now would be an appropriate time to explain their arsenals, abilities, and main goals. **

**Keiko mainly uses super strength with the aid of the gloves she invented, although she's still incredibly strong by normal standards without them. She's a master at most forms of hand-to-hand combat and self-defense, and she's also incredibly skilled in firearms. She knows how to use your standard pistols and machine guns, but she prefers to use anything huge and outrageous, like cannons or bazookas, haha. She has experience in chemistry and is largely responsible for the bombs Charlotte uses. Charlotte's taught her how to use knives and a bit of escapology, but she is still not very experienced in the either of them. She's typically the one smashing and tearing through a place, and acts as more as defense for when Charlotte's stealing the goods. She's always the one driving the getaway vehicle. She steals primarily to fuel projects and experiments that she runs under other aliases. She believes in anarchy in the correct sense, where the people rule the people, and there's no to minimal involvement from the government. Charlotte's Discordians obey her as second command since they see her more as a deity of Eris rather than the literal embodiment.**

**Charlotte is a master at sword fighting, fencing, and throwing knives, as she has a deep love and fascination for anything with blades. She's a pyromaniac with knowledge in creating explosives, and she loves using different kinds of bombs to harass citizens with. She'll fill them up with explosives, gasses (like tear, laughing, nerve, knockout), or powders (like itching or sneezing). The bombs take the form of golden apples, and she'll usually have each one inscribed in a various saying from a various language. A master of escapology. She's full of stamina and is incredibly fast and agile, so she's usually the one that does the actual stealing. However, she's not incredibly strong and doesn't really know hand-to-hand combat. She also becomes even more unconventional during her psychotic breaks, and usually strays away from the plan and ends up doing something else, which sometimes leads to them getting caught. Among stealing to satisfy her kleptomania, she likes to irritate citizens and Batman, and usually pits them against each other using her apples or by survival games (think gladiator style). She wants anarchy as a mix of both the correct sense and the stereotypical sense. She craves dysfunction, but knows that there needs to be order to a certain degree. She'd like the people to rule the people, but have some chaos and savagery among them. She has a cult following composed of Discordians, as her moniker Eris was taken after the Greek Goddess of chaos and Discordians are devout religious followers of the Goddess. But, she rarely uses them.**

**I probably should have added this as an A/N a long time ago, but oh well. I'll probably post it back there eventually.**


	16. Everybody's Got a Story to Tell

"Damn it, where are they?" Jonathan said, tapping on his watch.

"I'm sure they'll be here soon." Edward said.

After the two of them broke out, they robbed some stores for a new change of clothes. The two of them were wearing casual attire, nothing suspicious.

"Oh! Hello boys!" Charlotte said as she walked out of the elevator doors. She pulled out her keys and unlocked the door. "Please, do come in."

"What a lovely condominium. Is this your place?" Edward asked.

"Indeed it is." Charlotte happily replied. "ERWEN!" She yelled at the top of her lungs.

"Damn it, we're right here!" The lady replied from the couch in the living room.

"Gross!" Charlotte said, as they all took seats at the couch. "What's this slob still doing here?"

"We're watching a movie, Beaver." James said, rolling his eyes at her.

"Which one?"

"Letters to Juliet." Erwen replied, throwing her arms around James.

"Take a seat guys. Do you want any drinks? Maybe a snack?" Keiko asked the boys as she walked into the kitchen, flipping the lights on to the kitchen and the living room.

"Just some water will be fine, thank you." Jonathan said.

"How long have you known about where these girls lived?" Edward asked Jonathan.

"I've known for a **long **time. Nearly a **year**. Jealous?" He boasted.

"Oh, is that so?" Edward sneered.

"I'm right here you guys." Charlotte waved at them.

"Here's your water." Keiko said as she handed Jonathan his glass.

"Thank you."

"Of all the movies you could watch, why Letters to Juliet?" Charlotte asked Erwen.

"**Because **it's cute, that's why." Erwen sneered. She was of average height and slim build. She had red hair and freckles all over her face, with some of them straying onto her arms. She wore largely bohemian-esque and hippie styled clothing in natural, earthy colors. "Anyways. Hello!" She said, shifting her face to a friendly expression. "I'm Erwen, Angie's and Akemi's roommate and friend. And this is my boyfriend and Angie's brother, James. It's a pleasure to meet you." She said as she shook Edward's hand.

"Angie and Akemi?" Edward laughed.

"Angelique Blanchard and Akemi Arato are our aliases around here. Do you really think we'd live in such a nice complex without aliases?" Charlotte smiled.

"You mean... He knows?" Erwen asked, confused.

"Okay, sweetie. Let me introduce him. Erwen, this is Edward. Edward **Nigma**." Charlotte explained.

"You mean... **the **Riddler?" She gasped in horror.

"The one and only." He smirked.

"You need to stop bringing all of these criminal folks into our house. First Jonathan, and now this one?! You're gonna get us killed, Lettie!" Erwen exclaimed.

"These two are pretty sane, actually." Keiko said. "They're friends."

"Well, we've got **plans**." James said, returning his attention to the TV.

"What kind of plans?" Keiko asked.

"We were going to watch Letters to Juliet and cuddle." Erwen smiled as she sat down next to James and wrapped her arms around him.

"I'd rather go get a drink..." Charlotte scoffed. "Actually, a drink sounds really nice." She said, running upstairs to her room.

"What is she doing?" Edward grinned. "I could go for a drink."

"Changing." Keiko glared at him. "Are you going with her?"

"That's the plan." He said.

"Haha, yeah. I'm going to let a world-famous criminal go out with my sister? **Right.**" He said as he rolled his eyes and directed his attention back to the TV.

"Don't be absurd." Charlotte said as she stormed down the stairs. She was wearing a sweetheart neckline peplum, with black cigarette pants. She had a brunette wig on, cut into a bob, with straight bangs covering her forehead. She was carrying a pair of black high-heeled booties in one hand, and a leather purse in the other. "... It's only drinks with a friend." She said, slipping her booties on.

"It's not even Eddie she has the date with, it's Jonathan." Keiko smiled.

"Yep." Charlotte confirmed, pulling a compact mirror from her purse and applying some red lipstick.

"What?" James said, exasperated and full of shock.

"Calm down, we'll probably just go for a walk in the park or something." Jonathan assured.

"Yeah, it'll be nice." Charlotte said as she put her mascara on.

"Ready?" Edward asked her.

She threw on her leather jacket. "Yep! See you guys soon!" She said as the two of them walked out the door.

"... What a nerd." James said as he sat back down on the couch.

* * *

"Pick your poison." The man said as he cleaned out a glass.

"I'll have the usual, Mike." She smiled.

"I'll have a gin and tonic." Edward said.

"Coming right up!" The bartender said as he mixed their drinks. "Here you guys are. A gin and tonic for the gentleman, and a whiskey on the rocks for the lady." The bartender said, handing them their drinks and walking off to serve the other customers.

Charlotte took a straw and moved to a booth in the back, and Edward followed. She started sipping out of her glass.

"So, what's **your **story?" Edward asked her.

"I was born Charlotte Eileen Dunne in North Carolina." She whispered. "I was actually named after the city, since my mom thought that was the capital and she never really cared much about thinking for a **real **name." She laughed. "I was her third child and my father's first."

"Eileen? Dunne?" He smiled.

"My dad's last name was Dunne, but I changed it to White shortly after moving here. His favorite song at the time was 'Come on Eileen' by Dexys Midnight Riders, and he wanted to name me after the song. But my mom thought that was stupid and largely ignored his request." She smiled. "So, anyways. Shortly after I was born, my mother ditched my father and took a bus to South Dakota."

"Did they ever marry?" He asked her.

"... No. We moved into a large house with a huge backyard. The fence had a gate leading to the forest nearby."

"Oh, that sounds nice."

"It was a strange situation. Sure, it was a large house, it had five bedrooms and three bathrooms, but it was run down **and** we shared it with other families. ... A lot of which were lazy drug addicts living off of welfare."

"... Oh. How nice."

"Ha ha! Yeah, nice... We were poor, obviously. Mom was always unemployed and wasted most everything on drugs, so we never had much money for recreational activities. So, to make up for it, my two older brothers and I would run around town, playing pranks, stealing things, and causing mischief. You know, wild child things." She snickered.

"Didn't your mom punish you?"

"For the pranks and mischief, she would. She was the one who **taught** me how to steal, so she didn't get mad unless we stole something incredibly valuable, but only because that would be hard to sell on the black market." She laughed more.

"What was the biggest thing you stole?"

"A TV. We didn't even need one, my brothers and I just took it. We were always troublemakers, we even ended up in juvie a couple of times!" She laughed some more. "We were nasty little monsters... There would be drug busts every once in a while, and the parents would usually end up getting arrested or going to rehab. So, me and my brothers actually spent quite a bit of time in foster care facilities. Lots of court hearings, too. But that was only if our maternal grandmother wanted temporary custody."

"And which was better?" He asked her.

"Definitely the foster home!" She laughed. "My father found us again up there, when I was 7. Although, he kind of disappeared every now and then. But when he was around, he tried. We remained in and out of that house and foster care until I was 14 years old. That was when mom started odd jobs for a living, and in addition to her welfare, she started earning enough money to support herself and her three youngest in her own apartment. James was 19, and my other brother Daniel was 18, so she kicked them out. It was a bit run down and small, but still better than the house. When I graduated at the age of 16, mom kicked me out. I moved in with my boyfriend. Mom soon left my younger brother and baby sister in a home, and vanished off of the face of the earth. Never said goodbye, never left a note. She just dropped her kids and left."

"She doesn't sound like a very nice woman." Edward said, taking a drink of his gin. "Why didn't any of you adopt the children?"

"She wasn't. And my brothers and I already had a criminal record, and those two were repeatedly in and out of jail and rehab. I had already been admitted into asylums, so even if we wanted to we wouldn't have been able to take them in."

"I see..."

"I frequented the asylum, since the relationship I shared with my boyfriend was largely dysfunctional and was literally driving the both of us **crazy.** So, I left him and moved in with Keiko and Erwen when I was 19. I didn't have a job. I was too inept to hold one, let alone obtain one. I became a party goer shortly after mom kicked me out, I picked up a lot of nasty drug habits, and I slept around a lot after leaving my ex. Then I went to rehab when I was 21 to get help and clean up. After I sobered up, we got bus tickets, and tried to start a new life here. And just take a look at how **that **turned out!" She laughed more.

"Sounds like a rough childhood." He said, finishing off his gin.

"It was fun, but very dysfunctional." She replied, circling her finger on the rim of her empty glass. "What about your childhood? Tell me about it."

"As I've said before, it was largely normal. Mom was a bit estranged and my father was abusive." He said. "Only one pivotal event happened, and that was when I was in the 6th grade."

"Oh? What happened?"

"There was a contest being held at school. A prize to the kid who solved it first. I won. I bragged to my father, and he beat me out of jealousy. 'Idiot!' he yelled, 'You must of cheated! Admit it! You cheated!' he screamed at me. So, I largely remained under the radar to lessen the abuse." He said. "I moved out as soon as I could."

"That's **awful**!" She said. "He sounds like a horrible man."

"Just incredibly stupid." He chuckled. "I'll pay for your drink."

"Thank you." She smiled.

"Now you two be careful out there. There was a breakout at Arkham earlier this night!" The bartender warned as he took his money.

"Which ones?" Charlotte asked.

"Eris and Riot. Those two are nothing but trouble." He replied. "I've also heard that the Riddler and Scarecrow have made it out, and you know how creepy that Crow guy is."

"Oh, we'll be **extra **careful, Mike. You be careful too." She said as she escorted Edward back out into the lobby.

"Thank you, and god bless!" He waved.

"You're nice to people?" Edward asked her as they got into the elevator.

"It lessens suspicion." She smiled as the doors closed in front of them.


	17. This is My Home, In Which I Live

"We're back!" Charlotte happily sang as she burst through the door.

"Shh!" Erwen hushed her. "This is my favorite part!"

"Well then... Would you like a tour, Mister Nigma?" She asked him.

"I'd love a tour." He said.

"Good!" She grabbed his hand and dragged him over to the first room. "This is our kitchen." She said, flipping the lights on and off repeatedly. She grabbed his hand again and dragged him a few feet over. "This is our dining room, the room where we're **supposed **to dine but don't..." She led him a few more feet over. "This is the living room, the room in which we live... sometimes." She grinned as Jonathan and Keiko laughed. "It has couches, and TV, and a coffee table..." she said as she sat down and jumped up and down in her seat. "Although we don't drink coffee, so I'm not sure why we have this coffee table..." She jumped out of her seat and rushed to a door on the opposite side of the living room. "Here's the bathroom. Or, one of them." She walked a few feet over and opened the sliding doors, and took a step outside. "And here's the **lovely **view of Gotham that we get from our balcony." She said, filled with sarcasm. She led him back inside. "Oh! And **this!** This..." She said as she walked to a nearby room, and slowly opened the door. "These are where we keep some of our pets!"

"May I see them?" He asked her.

"Of **course **you may!" She said, grabbing into a huge cage. "These are my babies." She declared, with bunnies filling her arms. "This is Bonk, and this is Binky."

"Bonk and Binky?"

"As you probably already know, rabbits explore their habitats by means of sniffing and nudging their noses around. Bonk is the slang term for that. Binky, on the other hand, is a term for when a rabbit jumps and sort of spins in the air. Bonk is a curious fellow, always nudging his nose everywhere. Binky is a happy gal, always jumping for joy and scurrying around." She explained.

He glared at her, smirking as he examined her.

"... I didn't name them, of course, Erwen did."

"Why?"

"Well, this breed is known as the Jersey Wooly. They grow incredibly long, lush fur, that requires routine trimming. Well, when Erwen first got them for me when we moved here, she didn't get them trimmed."

"So?"

"They look like tribbles when you don't trim them, so she knew I probably would have given them Star Trek names." She grinned.

"Ha ha ha! Would you?" He laughed.

"... I would have given them Klingon names. The irony of it would have been **hilarious**, but... oh well." She smiled.

"You like the show?"

"... Voyager and Deep Space Nine were my favorites as a kid." She blushed. "Anyways, these handsome guys over here!" She said, putting her rabbits back into their cage, and directing him to a different one. "This one's Gypsy, and this one's Gumby." She said pointing to the birds.

"These are nice. Whose are they?"

"Erwen's." She smiled.

"I take it she likes animals?"

"She **loves **them. She's a veterinarian. She has a cat lazing around somewhere around here..." She said as she wandered out of the room. "Lets go upstairs." She said, running up the steps. "That's my room, and that's Koko's. Erwen's is down stairs. There's a guest room over here, too." She said, opening the guest room door. "Koko works out a lot, so the gym is over there, down the hall. And she has a small lab down there."

"You're not going to show me the rooms?"

"Well, no. Keiko doesn't like people in her room, and I don't either." She shrugged.

"Not even me? Can't you show me your room?" He insisted.

"I bet you it's a mess..."

She jumped when she heard scratching and barking at the door.

"Well, I guess I **have **to show you now." She said, opening the door and picking up the small dog.

"Is that yours?"

"No, Dumpster is Koko's." She said, leading him inside. "Here's the bed." She said as she took a seat down on it, jumping up and down a bit, with Dumpster's small head bobbing and all. "The balcony." She got up and opened the glass doors, and took a step outside.

"An ashtray?" He asked, pointing to it on the table outside, raising his brow at her.

"I'm a smoker."

"That's funny, I never imagined you as a smoker." He smirked.

"I smoke pretty often." She went back inside her room. "Over here's my bathroom. This was meant to be the master bedroom, so... I get my own bathroom!" She smiled. "And across from it, I have a walk-in closet." She said, opening the doors. It was filled with clothing, shoes, and handbags. And they weren't cheap, either. We're talking Tom Ford, Versace, Chanel... There were probably others, but she was moving a bit fast, and she quickly wandered off before he could get a glimpse of the other brands.

She plopped back onto her bed, staring at the ceiling. He took a seat next to her on the edge of the bed, and examined the room.

Most everything was white, and had golden accents. Lots of paintings on the walls. Some were pretty, but others were downright odd. A TV, he was guessing, was probably in the armoire. Lots of lace and feathers. Small trinkets were laid on the floor in geometric patterns. Dainty floral patterns were on the chairs. Dior makeup on her vanity. Some dolls and religious idols were on the dressers, along with expensive cigarettes and bottles of Jack Daniels next to them. _"She's not only a smoker, but also a heavy drinker?" _

"You drink as well?"

"I do enjoy my whiskey." She said, petting the small, black dog.

All of the sudden, the dog jumped, and began barking at Edward. It jumped off the bed, and rammed itself into the door, desperately trying to get through.

"Oh. He finally noticed you." She snickered.

"What do you mean just noticed me?"

"Well..." she sat up, "He's not exactly what you'd call 'smart', you see. He's mentally retarded."

"Oh?"

"Guests scare him a lot. So, he barks at them. He's not smart enough to attack." The dog collapsed, and abruptly fell asleep. "... He also has narcolepsy, so he falls asleep often. We keep a close eye on him, because if he falls asleep in his water bowl, then it's bye-bye doggy!" She laughed.

"Why would Keiko want such a useless animal?" He grunted.

"He's a sweetie when he warms up to you. He's also pretty entertaining at times. He has OCD, so he likes to arrange pillows and such into patterns. If you mess with them, he freaks out and starts whimpering and yelping. It's very scary, he sounds like something out of a horror movie." She laughed.

"Is that why there are trinkets arranged on the floor?"

"Most likely." She smiled as she placed Dumpster outside of the room, so she could pick up her trinkets.

"What's that in your hand? A rosary? Are you religious?" He asked her.

"Not in the slightest. It was a gift from somebody. I wear it every now and then." She said as put it over her neck.

"And is that wedding ring?" He grinned.

"... I've been engaged before. But, that didn't work out. Obviously." She smiled as she slipped it on her ring finger.

"It seems a bit too big for you... and it's not the prettiest either." He said, taking her hand and playing with the ring on her finger.

"He was a poor man... Didn't have the money back then." She softly smiled at him.

"Well, in my opinion, you deserve something **much** prettier than this." He said, rubbing her arm.

"Thank you." She smiled at him.

"With the police searching for me," he said as he slowly pinned her shoulders to the bed, "I'm going to need a place to sleep tonight, you know..." He grinned.

"You know, we have a guest room." She giggled.

"But, it'd be cozier sleeping with someone else." He whispered in her ear.

"Sleep in the guest room, Nigma." He heard Keiko say.

"And when did you get here?" He calmly asked her as he slowly got off of Charlotte, and sat down next to her.

"Sleep in the guest room. Jonathan needed to stay as well, so the two of you are sharing." She said, throwing a pillow at him. "James has some clothes you can borrow for the night. You'll find them on the bed."

"... So be it." He said as he got up and headed for the door.

"Goodnight, Edward." Charlotte said as she walked towards her bathroom.

He paused for a second in the doorway. "Goodnight, Charlotte." he said before leaving the room.

"He's such a creep." Keiko said, talking to Charlotte through the bathroom door.

"I think he's flattering." Charlotte replied, washing her face.

"He isn't doing it for the right reasons."

"I know. But neither am I."

Keiko scoffed and rolled her eyes.

"Don't you roll your eyes at me!" Charlotte said, walking out of the bathroom and getting back into her bed.

"... Goodnight, Lettie." Keiko smiled at her.

"Goodnight, Koko." Charlotte smiled back. She snapped the lights off and dozed off.

* * *

_**A/N: For those of you unaware, tribbles are soft, fuzzy animals in the Star Trek universe. They are endeared by nearly all races, and being the loving creatures that they are, love them back in turn. Except for Klingons, they can't stand Klingons, and Klingons go as far as to call them the mortal enemies of their race.**_


	18. Pies! Pies! Pies!

The early dawn slowly lit up the room. It must have been what, 6:30? He sluggishly forced himself out of bed. _"Best to leave early, I suppose."_ He thought to himself. He looked across the room to see that Jonathan had already gotten up out of bed. The smell of freshly baked goods filled the air. "_That isn't air freshener. It wasn't here last night. Best to investigate down stairs." _He said as he bolted through the door and hopped down the steps.

"... Sure, sunset sounds great." He heard Charlotte say.

"And what are you two talking about, hmm?" Edward asked, taking a seat next to Jonathan at the counter.

"Ah, so glad you could join us, Edward." Jonathan said, sitting at the counter and sipping on a cup of joe.

"Would you like some?" Charlotte asked, taking a pie out of the oven. Pies completely covered the counters. The kitchen was full of them! It was a complete mess, with all of the spilled filling on the counter, crumbs everywhere, piles of dirtied utensils everywhere. Edward was practically **cringing **at the sight of it.

"How long have you been at this?" Edward asked her as he poured himself a cup.

"Well, I woke up a little after 1... and got to work at 1:30..." She said, cutting a slice of apple pie out. "So somewhere around 5 hours, I think."

"Why all of the pies? Wouldn't one suffice?"

"She didn't know which one to bake." Jonathan chuckled.

"So, why not bake **all **the pies?" She grinned, taking a forkful of her pie. "You can take some home if you want, I wouldn't know what to do with all of them by myself."

"I already called the pumpkin ones." Jonathan said, pulling the stack of them closer to him.

"Oh my **god! **The kitchen is a mess!" Erwen yelled, running over to them.

"What are you doing up so early?" Edward asked.

"It's a Monday. I thought I'd get some coffee before heading off to work." She replied, going to the pantry to grab the can of ground coffee. "Oh my... It's nearly empty in here! And I just went shopping too! You used up **everything!**

"Well, yeah! Pies don't just pop out of thin air, silly!" Charlotte laughed.

"And where's my coffee can?!" She cried out.

"Edward took the last cup." Charlotte replied, happily eating her pie.

"What?! Ugh! Whatever! I'll just head to Starbucks or something." She spat out, filling a crate full of pies. "You **better **have this place cleaned up by the time I get home." She said, grabbing her keys and loading the crate on the carpeted dolly.

"And what are you going to do with all of those pies?" Edward asked, grabbing a slice of the chocolate one.

"I'm going to donate them to some shelters. Maybe I'll give some to my coworkers. Like **hell **I'm just going to let her sit around the house and eat pie all day when she has work to do."

"Have a nice day at work!" Charlotte yelled as Erwen stormed out the door. "Such a lovely morning." She sang as she grabbed her pills and whiskey.

"Are those birth control pills?" Edward grinned. "I thought you didn't like sex."

"I don't." She said, mixing her whiskey with a shot of apple cider and honey. "But I feel like it's still a good idea to stay on the pill."

"She hasn't gone off of it in 13 years." Jonathan said, eating a slice of his pumpkin pie.

"And why is that?"

"... Helps keep my skin clear." She said as she downed it with her drink.

"And what's with the drink? Apple cider and whiskey, sweetened with honey? You do know that you'll get drunk easier when you're on the pill, right?"

"My, you certainly **do **live up to your curious reputation, Mister Nigma. Apple cider is said to have cleansing properties. Supposedly, it helps you keep slim and keep your skin clear. Usually it's too strong to drink by itself, so most women add some honey and dilute it in a glass of water. Well, I like whiskey more, so I just mix it in that... And, yes, I do."

"And do you actually believe in that?" He chuckled.

"No, but it tastes good." She laughed. "Anyways, are you going to take some pies with you? Or...?"

"Sure, why not." He said, walking around the counter, looking for a pie suitable enough for him.

"Just take the rest of the chocolate. I hate chocolate. Take it!" She insisted.

"But why would you make a chocolate pie if you don't like chocolate?" He asked her, picking up one of her apple pies.

"Well, why wouldn't I?" She shrugged.

"How odd..." He smiled.

"Well, I must get going. Thank you for the coffee and the pies, they were delectable." Jonathan said, heading for the door.

"Goodbye, Jonathan. You take care!" She called out as he left.

"Ugh, what's with all the yelling? It's still only 6:45." Keiko said, slowly thumping down the stairs and stomping into the kitchen.

"Sorry! Would you like some pie?" Charlotte said, sliding her a piece of lemon meringue. "It's your favorite!" She sang.

"The kitchen is a goddamn mess." She replied, taking a seat at the counter.

"So, when are **we **going to go on that date, Lettie?" Edward asked, smirking as he went to go stand next to her.

"I'm free game after Friday." She replied.

"And why Friday?"

"You're an intelligent man. I think you know that's when I have my date with Jonathan."

"But wouldn't you rather go out with somebody much more intelligent and good-looking than instead of that stick-limbed flagpole? Somebody such as myself?" He grinned, wrapping his arm around her.

"Although I'd **love **to go with somebody as charming as yourself, a date is a date. I can't cancel it. Sorry." She smiled back.

"... Very well. I'll take an apple pie and a chocolate pie." He frowned.

"But **I **like the chocolate pie." Keiko said, pulling it towards her.

"Oh, quit pulling his leg, Koko. Seeing as how you already cut out a slice, I think you should have it, Eddie." Charlotte said as she pulled it away from Keiko and pulled it back towards Edward.

"Thank you, Lettie." He smirked at Keiko as he rightfully claimed his pie.

"It's just a pie." Keiko shrugged.

"Well, I must be on my way. I've got things that I should really get to work on. Thank you for the coffee and the pies, Lettie." He said.

"If you give me your number, I might actually call you about that date, you know..." Charlotte smiled as she started washing the bowls out. He smirked as he grabbed a pen and a piece of paper and wrote it down.

"There you go. I'll hear from you **very **soon." He grinned, walking out the door.

Keiko rolled her eyes as she switched on the TV, where Vicky Vale was reporting on the latest museum attractions.

"Oh, look at this! In two weeks, imported jewelry and gems are going to be donated to the museum from 'generous benefactors' from around the world." Keiko yelled.

"And their value?" Charlotte asked, taking the phone number and wiping the counters off.

"All together, they value around 50 **million **dollars. It'll be like stealing candy from a baby!"

"Lets do it." She said, grinning as she began scrubbing the utensils.

* * *

_**A/N: Sorry if it was kinda short and boring. The next one will be more interesting, I promise~!**_


	19. What Are You Afraid Of?

She patiently waited for him by the pond, throwing seeds on the ground below her to feed the crows pecking at them. She had been incredibly early, so she didn't mind waiting for him. The park was nearly desolate. After all, it was the nearing the beginning of autumn and it was starting to get **very** chilly **very **fast. She saw maybe eight other people on the other side of the park, and not to mention the fewer pairs nearby who were probably lovebirds.

_"Couples. I hate couples." _She scoffed as she tossed some more seeds at the crows. _"Just a bunch of empaths mindlessly screwing each other and feeding each other's egos. That's all a relationship is when you dissect the matter."_ Empathy was something that she did not give people easily, and she knew of course, that empathy is an important part of a relationship. But, she didn't want to put in the effort of empathizing with people, why would she? Why would they deserve her empathy in the first place? They've always labeled her out of fear and misunderstanding of her "illnesses", always casted her off into concrete pens and shoved pills down her throat in cheap attempts to change the way she thinks, the way she operates, and the way she lives. They never deserved her empathy.

"Crows **love **pumpkin seeds." Jonathan said, taking a seat next to her at the bench. "You look upset. I hope you weren't waiting too long." He said, cleaning his glasses with a handkerchief.

"Not at all. It wouldn't be your fault anyways. I thought that it would have been best for me to leave my apartment as early as possible, since the walk here is so long." She smiled as she tossed another handful of feed at the crows.

"Still **scared **of vehicles, Charlotte?" He grinned.

"... It was a lovely walk." She grinned back.

"The sun's beginning to set."

"The dusk was always my favorite time of day."

"Would you like to go on a walk with me?" He asked as he offered her his hand.

"I'd be delighted." She smiled as she took his hand.

"... I see your medications are working well." He said as the two of them got up.

"Is this how you begin your conversations with all of your dates?" She chuckled as the two of them headed toward the bridge. "It would be funny, seeing as how you're a psychologist and all."

"Still don't like psychologists, I'm guessing?" He asked her.

"You're okay since you differ and admit that fact, but no, I don't like psychologists." She said, leaning over the railing on the bridge. "I don't like any of the personnel in the asylum. They all pretend like they care so much. Like they know us so well. Like they understand. It's **insulting**. They live perfectly 'normal' and 'happy' lives, and read romanticized stories and poems about lives like ours for pleasure, and still have the gall to try to 'help' people like us, and it's **disgusting**."

"... That's understandable." He laughed.

"Whatever!" She laughed as she playfully nudged his arm.

"... I'm glad you chose to date me first." He said, leaning over the railing with her.

"Excuse me?"

"You know, over that pain in the ass they call Edward."

"Don't like him?"

"He's a textbook narcissist. He's unlikely to have a severe case of NPD, but he's still **very **annoying for a narcissist. But I guess you would already know that from Daryll, wouldn't you?"

"Bringing up Daryll on our date? It's a poor decision to bring up my exes." She said, getting off of the railing and wandering off. He followed behind her. "Although, I think I would bring a much **different **approach on Edward than I used with Daryll."

"It would still be incredibly challenging."

"I don't mind a challenge. That is, depending on what it's on. I'll just have to find out, I suppose."

"I'd advise against it."

"And why do **you **care so much? Trying to manipulate me?"

"Pardon?"

"You know I don't like being told what to do. About my compulsion to break orders." She paused, turning herself around to look up at the lanky man towering over her. "So, why are you telling me what to do?"

"Not at all... Just advising you."

"... Of **course **you are." She smiled at him.

A black cat approached the two.

"You know what this means? Good luck!" She said, leaning over to pet the kitty.

"Superstitious as always." He said.

"It **is **Friday the 13th, after all."

"I'm surprised that you decided to come out at all, since it's Friday the 13th."

"I could make an exception for you..."

Silence fell as the two of them continued their walk.

"You know... There's a superstition says that if a woman is buried in black, she'll haunt the family." She said.

"And?"

"My paternal grandmother was buried in black. I see her around, every now and then. Keiko and Erwen have confirmed sightings of her, too."

"You'll have to resort to means other than cheap lies if you're trying to scare **me**."

"I'm **not** lying. It's the truth. Although, she usually bothered my grandfather the most. I think she missed him. Sad, isn't it?"

He smiled, taking a seat on a pile of leaves underneath a tree. He patted on the leaves next to him, inviting her to take a seat. "We can finish watching the rest of the sunset here." She took a seat next to him, zipping up her jacket. "Getting cold?" He asked.

"It's getting to that time of year again!" She cheered. "You know that autumn's one of my favorite seasons."

"Ah, yes. Children playing miserable pranks and hijinks as they sack candy from the neighborhood weaklings, and soon after fight over the best pieces of turkey meat with their siblings and cousins, as their grandparents tell boring stories, and the mothers all gossip."

"I've always **hated **thanksgiving. It's overrated. It's pretty much as you said, but the kids are **vicious**. My grandma always made the **worst **jello, and she'd get pissed if you didn't grab seconds. And then my dad would show up drunk and uninvited, and would probably end up in a fight with whoever mom was dating. Sometimes, my paternal grandfather would arrive with my dad, and tell stories about '**the war**' and try to hit on my maternal grandma."

"Jello? Drunk dads? Grandfathers hitting on grandmothers? It sounds like chaos." He laughed.

"It was only enjoyable when fights broke out amongst the kids." She laughed.

A couple walked past them, giggling as they strolled in each others arms, and pecking at each other with smiles.

"Look at them. How **disgusting** they are." He scornfully growled.

"How creepy they look, grinning at each other like a bunch of morons."

"Creepy."

"And gross."

As she grew bored from the silence, she began to rip blades of grass out of the ground.

"It's boring here. Would you like to go back to** my **place?" He asked her.

"Sure... why not...?" She replied.

* * *

They were at his apartment, watching Friday the 13th in the dark. Horror movies never really scared her. Sometimes, when she would watch movies with Keiko, she'd wince at incredibly gory scenes, but only because she thought they were **disgusting**. Or she'd laugh like a maniac. It could go either way.

"What movie scares you the most?" He asked.

"As you know, they don't **scare **me, but the most disgusting one I've ever watched is probably Cannibal Holocaust." She answered.

"You've watched Cannibal Holocaust?" He turned to her, ignoring the screams on the television.

"It's one of Keiko's favorite movies. We watch it every Halloween. But not with Erwen, she cried herself to sleep the first time she attempted to watch it." She giggled.

"What do **you **like about it? I personally **love **the way they portray the media, and-"

"How they raise all of the sociological questions on morality?" She finished his sentence. "The common idiot looks at it and thinks that it's just another brainless slaughter movie, but it's **not**. It's a film that has a powerful message-"

"On violence and savagery? I also love how they portray the ignorance that people have on other races, seeing as how the entire movie is essentially satire on that matter."

"I like how they turn our sympathies and empathies into mere toys. People are disgusted by cannibalism, but it's incredibly satisfying to see the 'protagonists' being eaten by the natives, especially after they abused the natives so horribly... Isn't it?" She said as she flashed him a wicked smile.

"It's a great movie..." He replied, turning his attention back to the television.

He slowly snaked his arm around her. She played along and leaned in against him, resting her head on his chest. He pulled her chin up, and gave her a passionate French kiss. After he broke away, he grinned at her. But this wasn't a friendly smile, no, this was more of a malevolent grin. She stared at him, shocked, frozen in fear.

"I got you..." He whispered in her ear before pinning her down, giving her another soft kiss on the lips. He pulled out his syringe, and shot her up with his fear toxin. He laid himself back next to her, rested his head on the arm rest, and watched her in delight as she slowly went into a hypnotic daze, as a painful, miserable, and broken look crept on her face.

There were roaches, roaches **everywhere**, and they were surrounding her and Jonathan. It was true, that most people didn't like roaches, but they **horrified **her. She cringed as she huddled next to him, being careful not to move. Where was she? Was this an ambulance? Why was she in an ambulance? Why weren't they doing anything about the swarms of roaches? And what's that doctor doing with that syringe? This was the **worst**. She was **horrified **of hospitals, and **horrified **of automobiles.

_"We need to take you to the morgue... The body... we need you to identify it." _She heard the doctor murmur as he prepped a syringe._ "But first... you need... you need your medications. You've been a bad girl..."_

Jonathan smiled as he saw her trembling. He tenderly wiped off tears that poured down her face. He dragged his fingertips along her cheeks, and softly caressed her face. _"She looks so lovely when she cries like that." _He thought to himself, giving her another light peck on the lips. He **loved **her reactions to fear, how silent and docile she was. Soft whimpering, cringing, trembling, quivering, the occasional yelping, with crying spells, and maybe even the occasional vomiting.

_"__How fascinating." _He thought as he took out his clipboard and began writing down notes on her reactions. Tonight was going to be a very entertaining night for him...

* * *

_**A/N: Charlotte is 5'2. Jonathan is said to be 6'1. I've also heard that he's 6'0, but I myself am pretty tall and am not really impressed by 6'0, so I'm going with 6'1. Edward is said to be the same height as Jonathan (6'1). Characters have mentioned that Charlotte is pretty short and tease her about this, so I just thought I'd clarify how tall she is (:**_

_**Also, I've been getting TONS of views and visitors to most of my chapters, but very little reviews? We should fix that, you guys! Drop me a review, any review! I don't bite! **_


	20. They've Got Plans to Prepare For

Keiko went to Jonathan's house first thing the next day. She had been worried all night. There were no calls, no messages, no texts, nothing. However, she didn't want to stop by in the middle of the night, because she thought that something **other **than an attack could be a possibility, and walking in on that would have been pretty awkward. She approached the door, and gave it a couple of good bangs. She jumped a little when she heard the creaky door open.

"Oh, hello there, Keiko. Would you like to come in?" Jonathan asked.

"Where's Charlotte?" She asked, barging in. "I **demand **to know."

"Relax, relax! She's right here, on the couch." He said, presenting Charlotte to her.

She still lying down on the couch, pale and clammy, shivering a bit. Jonathan had her covered with a blanket, and gave her an icepack for her aching forehead. She was sipping at water, trying not to tremble and spill her glass. She sat up when she saw Keiko there.

"What the **hell **happened?!" She yelled, taking a seat next to Charlotte.

"He g-gassed me." Charlotte replied, still trembling a bit.

"You **gassed **her?!" She jeered, jumping out of her seat, yelling at him.

"Well, nothing bad happened. I monitored her all night. I even took notes, would you like to see them?" He asked, getting ready to take out his clipboard.

"Did you look at it?" She turned to ask Charlotte.

"No, I-I thought I'd save myself the embarrassment." Charlotte replied, shuddering and she grabbed her glass again.

"So... **Nothing **bad happened?" Keiko asked him.

"No." He replied.

"**Absolutely **nothing?"

"If you're referring to sexual assault, then **no**, I did **not **take advantage of her. There was no intercourse. I gassed her, and I took notes. That's all I did. Anyways, I have plans." He said, walking over to the door and opening it for them. "She's been vomiting, so give her lots of fluids to flush her system. She should be fine."

"You forgot to mention the parts where you kissed me." Charlotte grinned as she and Keiko marched out the door, bringing her fingers to her lips.

"**What?**" Keiko stressed, completely astonished.

"Goodbye, you two. Have a safe walk home..." He grinned back before closing the door behind him.

* * *

"So, tell me what happened." Keiko opened the door, and took a seat on their couch.

"Well, I arrived at the park early, so I fed the crows as I waited. He arrived, we took a walk around the park, made some small talk, and then he took me to his house." Charlotte said. "We were watching Friday the 13th and we were talking every now and then, making small little conversations. Somewhere around the middle of the movie, he kissed me..." She said, spacing out, and touching her lips. "... And then he gassed me and took notes."

"He kissed you, huh...?" Keiko said, thinking.

"It was strange... He gave me kisses, dried my tears, touched my face... So tender..." She said, slowly mimicking the actions with her hand.

"Hmmm... Why didn't you fight back? That's what you usually would have done."

"I trust him enough, I suppose... Although his touching my face **did **disturb me a bit." Charlotte shuddered.

"I thought you liked him?"

"Yes, but as a **friend**..."

"Edward's the one you like, huh?" Keiko teased, grinning just like Charlotte would.

"Not at all." She smirked.

"Speaking of Edward, are you still going to give him that call? It's been nearly a week." Keiko asked, raising her brow.

"Nope!" She giggled.

"Are you ever going to call him? He's probably growing impatient." She laughed.

"He's a grown man, he'll be able to deal with it. You've got to keep a man on his toes, you know..." She responded. "Where's Erwen and Jimmy?"

"They wanted to take Clarissa to the carnival."

"Oh! That's right! The carnival's in town!" She squealed out with joy. "Why didn't they invite us?"

"They wanted to take **Clarissa**."

"Whatever." She huffed as she threw herself back on the couch, grabbing the remote and flipping the TV on. Keiko heard her stomach growling.

"You don't look too good..." Keiko said. "You still look clammy."

Charlotte quickly jumped out of her seat and bolted towards the bathroom, holding her mouth shut with her hand. Keiko cringed at the loud gagging she heard coming from inside of there.

"Ew..." Keiko said, preparing two glasses of ginger ale and a damp rag for her. Keiko walked in and took a look at Charlotte. She was leaning over the toilet seat, exhausted. "Reminds me of the old days." Keiko chuckled, handing her the ale. "Here. It will help rinse the taste out of your mouth."

"Thank you..." She murmured, taking the glass and gargling the ale, spitting it into the toilet bowl.

"Drink this other glass. It will help your stomach feel better. And I'm confiscating your alcohol, all that shit will do is make your stomach **worse**. And you need to be in shape for tomorrow." Keiko said. "Well, I've got to get to work on our arsenal for the heist next week." she said, walking out of the bathroom and heading for her lab.

_"And I should go warm up a bit more..." _She thought to herself, getting off of the seat and flushing the remains. She got up and grabbed the other glass and the rag, and headed for their gym.

* * *

Another week had passed, and still no call from her!

_"Inexcusable!" _He thought to himself, angrily pacing his living room. _"She has the audacity to ask for **my **number, and then ignore me for nearly two weeks? Such an **irritating **woman!" _He sat down in his seat, recoiling and grabbing his hair in frustration. He took a deep breathe, and calmed himself down.. _"Does she think herself too good for **me**? **The** Edward Nigma? No, that's not possible... she's just toying with me. Yes... this is all just a game to her, isn't it? Am I just something to pass the time with? Well then, I'll have to show her how **dangerous **the player she's decided to play our little game of charades with can be, won't I?" _He grinned to himself, rubbing his chin.

"Tomorrow, one of the biggest parties of the year will be held tomorrow at the museum, in honor of the generous anonymous benefactors who've donated nearly 50 million dollars worth of rare gems and jewelry from all around the world!" The ditzy blonde said on the TV, grinning like a Barbie doll on crack. "The mysterious men will reveal themselves before the valuables are put on display for all of the guests to gander at! The gems will be made available for public viewing the following week on Monday..."

_"Gems? Parties? Sounds right up her alley, especially if diamonds are going to be present. She'd enjoy crashing a party of that magnitude... So **I'll **be gracing them with my presence as well. That ought to get everybody's attention, including **hers**." _He smirked, flipping off the TV and getting to work on his makeshift plans for the following night.

* * *

_**A/N: You guys will find out who Clarissa is soon enough. (;**_


	21. Mayhem at the Museum

_"11:55"_

Charlotte stood there at the refreshment tables, killing time before the clock struck midnight. It was still Sunday, and she** mustn't** exert herself on Sundays. That would be a disrespect in her eyes. It was already an act of disrespect, just being there on a Sunday. Normally, she would wear her black rosary and ring, but she wouldn't dare to even **think **of possibly risking the chances of damaging or losing them during the getaway process.

_"Forgive me." _

She wore her usual work attire. A short, fringed flapper dress, glitzy high heels, and elaborate golden jewelry. She wasn't wearing a cloche or a headband, since she didn't want it to ruin the finger curls in her short wig. She wore all of this, but in black. That's right, **black**. It was one of her traditions after all, wearing only black on Sundays. Plus, it was a **great **disguise for when she was out and about. The only thing she had on that wasn't black had to be the deep, burgundy lipstick she had on. She didn't mind wearing black lipstick on a Sunday, but if she had chosen to wear black lipstick to this event, she would have stuck out like a sore thumb. Which, she usually **embraced**, but she knew attention would come later. There were already enough men staring at her as it was. _"Maybe I **should **have used that black lipstick!" _She giggled to herself.

"... And your name?" She heard a man ask her.

She froze. _"When the hell did this guy get here?" _

"Your name, miss?" He asked again.

"Irene." She replied, smiling sweetly as she offered her hand to him. _"I have no idea who the hell this is."_

"I'm Isaac." He smiled as he shook her hand. "May I have this dance?" He asked her, bowing politely.

"Sorry, but I think I see my date over there." She grinned, pointing across the room.

"Oh **my**!" He exclaimed, staring wide-eyed at Keiko.

She had gotten her hair cut, so her black hair was more in a pixie fashion, but a tad bit longer and messier. Her suit was black, and it was nicely fitted to her stature. Shiny black loafers covered her feet. Black eye shadow, along with burgundy lips to match Charlotte's. And a pork pie hat, to adorn her head and finish the snazzy outfit. Normally, Keiko would have gone with something from a thrift shop, but those suits usually didn't fit her well, and would have attracted even **more **attention. A dress would have Charlotte's preference, but Keiko didn't like to wear those. Too cold and airy.

Charlotte strayed from the man and trailed toward Keiko.

"Why did that guy look so bummed down?" Keiko asked, taking a glass of punch from Charlotte.

"I told him you were my date." Charlotte replied, downing her whiskey.

"**What?!**"

"Gah, this is the **worst** punch I've ever had." She said, trying hard not to gag.

"It's not that bad." Keiko shrugged.

_"12:00"_

"It's show time!" Charlotte yelled, ripping the black dress off to reveal her white bodysuit. She threw her black wig to the side and tossed her wig cap into the punch, and whipped around her long, blonde ponytail. She strutted across room, laughing loudly as she tossed one of her heels at the cake, and the other at the punch fountain. She strapped her throwing knives around her hips and around her left leg. She threw some apples across the room, where they lay dormant. "You know the drill!" She yelled out as she slipped on her golden shoes and strapped her gas mask to her free leg, and ran off to do her job.

Keiko slipped on her gloves and pulled out her AK-47. She threw her hat into the crowd and slipped on her gas mask before firing the first rounds into the air. She didn't say a word, but they knew what to do. They cowered and kneeled on the ground. She walked over to each of the apples and twisted their stems. They released a strong knockout gas, and everyone in the room passed out. Well, all except for **another **person. No, **two**. Strike that someone else got off of the ground, so, **three **other people?

"**Edward?! **What the hell are you and your girls doing here?!" She yelled out. "Fuck!" She yelled again as she turned around and shielded herself. The heels Charlotte threw earlier were laced with explosives, and blew the refreshment table to smithereens!

"I wanted in on the party crashing, but it seems like the two of you already have that covered..." He replied, his words muffled from his mask. "Such a bummer, I even brought the girls." He added as he watched the spurting punch fountain.

She ran out of the room, ignoring him. Guards charged at her when she reached the third hallway.

"Stop right there!" One of them cried.

"The fuck I am!" She roared as she hulked through them, flying across the room from the sheer force of her combat. She ran around the halls and rooms, thinning them out as much as she could. She knew that she would fail Charlotte if there were too many guards around to attack her. They'd probably end up back in Arkham if she failed, and like hell she would let that happen under her watch!

* * *

Charlotte flew down the hall, flipping over the guards, bashing their heads against each other mid-air. She chortled as she heard the two of them pass out behind her. She saw two of them getting ready to shoot their tasers at her. She continued her sprint, throwing her knives at them as she approached them, destroying their guns and pinning them to the walls. One of them tried to jump her, but she retaliated and roundhouse kicked him in the face, knocking him out. She came to a stop at a giant room, where the vault was located.

_"Now... what was that code?"_ She thought as she stared down the giant door. Guards pulled out their guns, and aimed them at her. She rolled some apples out into the center of the room. The guards braced themselves, but no explosion.

"Hands behind your back, missy." One of the guards ordered.

"Very well... But first, a gift!" She declared, taking the gas mask off of her leg and presenting it to them with a wide smile and model hands. She strapped it onto her face and reached into her bra, pulling out a trigger. She waved it in the air at them, and threw it into the crowd by the apples.

"The trigger!" One of them yelled. As they clamored for it, she pulled **another **trigger out of her bra.

"Suckers!" She yelled, placing her thumb on the button and playfully rubbing it. Right as they were about to take action, she hit it. A foggy gas spurted out of the apples. The guards coughed violently, hanging over and eventually falling to the floor in a fit of coughing. A few had attempted to cling to her and handcuff her, but she shook them off with ease. They all dropped like flies, passed out and drooling on the floor. "Yuck." She said, tip toeing over their bodies and heading for the vault. She brought a finger to where her lips would have been, and began pondering as she set her eyes on the beautiful sight of vault door again.

_"Now... what was the code again?"_

* * *

Groans and moans filled the halls. _"Most of them appear to be under control..." _Keiko thought, scanning the rooms and halls for any passersby that might of slipped away. She brought out the map when she hit the storage room. _"Where the hell am I?" _She wondered, bringing out the map that Charlotte had printed out for her. She was already late. Even if she considered herself smarter_*****_, navigation was never her thing. Charlotte was always the one who took care of that.

"Lost again?" She heard Charlotte say as she strutted towards her.

"Charlotte?"

"Don't I look **fabulous **in all of this jewelry?" Charlotte asked her, rubbing the jewels on her neck. "Here, take some. It's hard for me to flip about with all this crap on my neck." She grunted, throwing some necklaces over Keiko's head and handing her a satchel.

"Let's **go**. I heard guards say Batman was busy with Two-Face so we should really get going before he catches wind of us." Keiko said, bracing her gun as she burst through the walls. "We're back where we started!" She yelled in frustration, stomping her feet at the sight of Edward in the main ballroom. She bolted out into the second hallway where she ran into hoards of SWAT teams.

"My my, don't you look lovely, Charlotte." He said approaching her, leaning in on his cane. "Doesn't she, girls?"

"Oh, absolutely gorgeous." Echo said.

"Stunning!" Query replied.

"You never called me." He sneered, glaring at her.

"I've been a busy girl." Charlotte replied, shrugging before she set her hands on his chest.

"I've a proposal for you." He smirked, trapping her in his arms, but keeping his hands on his cane.

"Already? Oh my, we've only know each other two months, Mister Nigma!" She cackled.

"Come to my place tomorrow night, we can have dinner."

"I'm not much of a dinner person."

"What about dessert? Do you like **dessert**? We can skip dinner and go straight to dessert." He said, grinning suggestively.

"Oh, I **love **dessert. But, I'm on a diet." She quickly retorted, smiling back.

"Ha ha ha! It's good to know there's a fully functional brain behind that pretty face of yours. Quite rare nowadays. I'll see you tomorrow."

"**CHARLOTTE!**" Keiko yelled out from the distance, throwing Robin at Batman's head and knocking the Bat out. "Get your ass out here! Time to go!"

"Sorry, but I have plans." Charlotte said, hurriedly ducking underneath his arms and running over to aid Keiko.

"Shame that I'll have to resort to force..." He said, grinning at his henchwenches.

Robin bolted at Charlotte, but she stepped over to the side a bit, and grabbed him by his wrists. She spun him around her using his momentum, and Keiko punched his lights out.

"Has it ever bothered you that we beat the shit out of an adolescent boy every time we pull a stint?" Charlotte laughed as the two of them ran towards their getaway vehicle.

"Nope." Keiko replied, handing her a motorcycle helmet before putting on her own. "Hop on." She commanded. "I don't want you pulling an episode like **last **time. That was fucking embarrassing." She said as she started it. Charlotte reluctantly sat down and clenched onto Keiko for dear life as they took off.

* * *

"Man! Look at all of this loot!" Charlotte squealed, pouring her spoils out of their purses. The girls had disguises hidden in bags all over the city. It was easier for them to slip away from a crime scene that way.

"This one would look good on Erwen." Keiko said, the gem glistening on the bracelet in the light.

"Aw, I really liked that one." Charlotte pouted, slipping the diamond jewelry on and striking poses in her hand mirror.

"You can keep all of the diamonds, sapphires, and opals. I want the rubies and garnets. Erwen likes the emeralds and topaz, she can have them if she wants."

"So be it." Charlotte replied, slipping another set on and flexing into more poses. Keiko laughed. "What is it?"

"... I guess that in your case, the saying is true. 'Diamonds are a girl's best friend!'" Keiko smiled, putting her gems and jewelry back into her bag. She flipped on the TV. "Ha ha** ha**! Charlotte! You'll never guess who one of the 'generous' benefactors were!" She boomed loudly. Charlotte directed her attention to the news broadcast on the television.

"... **What**?!" Charlotte gasped, dropping her jaw from disbelief. "**Him?!**" She growled.

"I thought you noticed! He was one of the people announced when you went to go powder your nose. He left shortly after." She cackled even more.

"Hmm..." Charlotte mumbled, slowly taking her seat on the couch. "Here," she said as she ripped off the jewelry and put them back in their bags, "Keep them."

"What? Why?" Keiko asked, shocked. "What's wrong with those diamonds?"

"I don't want them. Not if they came from him." She pouted.

"You can't be serious!" She cried out.

Charlotte sat there, crossing her arms and pursing her lips.

"Holy shit, you are serious, aren't you?"

"If you don't take them, then I'll **return **them. I don't want to own anything that belonged to **that **man."

"... Fine, I'll take them. But only because you'll look like a goddamned **idiot **if you return them." Keiko said, swiping the bag and heading up the stairs. "I can think of a few customers on the black market who'd **love **to get their hands on these..."

"I want half the money." Charlotte grinned.

"What?" Keiko asked, walking backwards a few steps and pausing.

"You heard me. **Half **of the money. Or I'll return them."

"Ugh! Fine! ... Asshole..." She murmured as she walked back up the stairs.

"I heard that!" Charlotte grinned some more as she flipped the TV off and rested herself comfortably on the couch.

* * *

_**A/N: *According to tests done by Arkham, Keiko has an IQ of 163, and Charlotte has an IQ of 156. Therefore, Keiko believes herself to be smarter. Charlotte, however, disregards the IQ system as she claims that intelligence differs and cannot be measured accurately. Or she refuses to admit her inferiority, heh heh.**_


	22. Their First Date

Charlotte was out shopping for groceries. Luckily, she lived in the uptown of Gotham, where things really weren't as bad as middle or lower Gotham, so her chances of getting mugged were pretty low. She was walking, of course. She didn't know how to drive. Well, she knew how to drive, and she knew everything that there was to know about cars. But her **fear **was what prevented her from actually taking the driving portion of the test with an instructor. She smiled and beamed, laughing to herself as she recounted the old days. Back when she lived in South Dakota. Back when she was still Beaver. Back when her then-boyfriend was teaching her how to **actually **drive...

_"Okay, Charlie. Get in the driver's seat." He said, holding the door open for her. She stared at the car, and its rusty, dirty metal frame. Its scratched, dusty hubcaps. The ripped leather seats. Like hell she was going to get in there. "**Beaver**, get in there. **Now.**" He scowled at her. She slowly approached the opening, and took a good look at it. She turned to the tall, dark man holding the door open for her. _

_"Do I... Do I **have **to?" She sheepishly chuckled. "I mean, walking is healthier anyways and it would be less smog and-"_

_"Get in the car. I drive all the time. You'll be fine. I **promise**. Keiko's standing by to call the paramedics if anything goes wrong." He said, giving her a warm hug. She got in, closed the door, and fastened her seat belt. She put the keys in the ignition and started the car. He got into the shotgun. "You know what to do. Set your foot on the gas **lightly**." She set her foot down, setting the smallest amount of pressure that she could, grasping for dear life on the steering wheel. "... What the fuck, are we even moving?!" He yelled at her, frustrated at how slow the car was going. She set a teensy bit more pressure on the gas. "... I legit think that a snail just passed us, Beaver."_

_"I'm trying, okay?!" She whined, trying hard not to cry._

_"Trying my ass! Set more pressure on the goddamn pedal!"_

_She set a tiny bit more pressure._

_"More."_

_She set a little more pressure_

_"**More!**" He roared._

_"OKAY!" She screeched, flooring it._

_"WHAT THE FUCK BEAVER ARE YOU TRYING TO GET US KILLED?!"_

_"I'M SETTING MORE PRESSURE ON THE GODDAMN PEDAL."_

_"We're swerving! Calm down! Use the brake!" He cried out! But it was too late! She swerved off the side of the road, and landed the car at the bottom of the steep hill! The airbags deployed. Her browline glasses smashed against them, popping out the lenses, slicing along her brow line and underneath one of her eyes. The both of them were pretty badly bruised from the accident. They coughed as the dirt clouds surrounding them slowly dissipated. _

_"Awwww, **fuck**!" He whined, tears streaming down his face. "My baby! It's ruined!" He yelled, throwing his face deep into the airbag and sobbing._

_"You're such an asshole, Daryll!" She yelled, hitting him on the arm._

_"Holy shit! Charlotte?! Daryll?! Are you guys okay?" Keiko yelled, pulling Charlotte out of her seat. _

_"Daryll's an asshole!" She yelled back, dropping to the floor and cringing, crying her eyes out._

_"Fucking- It's all Beaver's fault!" He screamed back, pounding his fists on his ruined car. Keiko rolled her eyes at their melodramatics as she sat down on the trunk, facepalming herself._

... She still couldn't believe that happened, and it had been over a decade since. _"I was such an idiot!" _She laughed. She yelped as she felt somebody snag her into an alley. She dropped her groceries and was going to attempt self-defense, but it wouldn't of mattered anyways. The attacker brought a rag to her face, and she quickly nodded off...

* * *

She regained consciousness, though she was a bit hazy from the chloroform. She felt a burlap sack being slipped off of her head. Her vision was still blurry, but she tried to discern her surroundings. _"__Okay, I see red, lots of red... Little lights? So, candles? Oh no..." _She thought. She raised a hand to rub her eyes when-

"Ah ah ah! You wouldn't want to ruin the makeup that the girls worked so hard on, now would you?" She heard Edward say.

"We would be so sad if you did." Echo said.

"Absolutely devastated!" Query added.

"... Edward? Echo? Query? What?" She said, slowly waiting as her vision restored itself. "What the..."

"I said I'd see you tomorrow night, and well, never let it be said that I'm not a man of my word!" He explained. "Girls, she looks **beautiful**. You're excused." He said, shooing them off. "I do hope you enjoy steak."

"I don't usually eat meat, but I'll make an exception." She said, grabbing onto her fork.

"Vegetarian?" Edward asked her. "Or, is it because of your hippie friend?"

"The hippie friend. She's vegetarian, so she doesn't like it when we eat meat. Also, a red dress?" She asked, slightly tugging down on her dress.

"I always thought you'd look stunning in red. And I was right, of course. You should wear red more often."

"The only complaint I have is how short and revealing this is, but thank you." She said. "I love the location you've picked."

"I thought you'd take a liking to my balcony. Care for some wine?"

"I'd love a glass, thank you." She smiled, lifting her glass towards him and let him pour it in for her. "Trying to get me drunk?" She asked, smiling as she brought the glass to her lips.

"Excuse me?"

"You know I'm on the pill. And how the effects of alcohol are amplified by the contraceptives. I'd get drunk faster, and easier to do."

"But that's where you have it wrong. See, that's what **most **men would do. And I'm definitely not **most **men. I am my own unique, intelligent, and superior individual. I live for challenges, especially those for a woman such as yourself." He smirked, taking another bite from his steak.

"Good thing... And a woman such as myself? How do you categorize me?" She smirked back.

"You? You're... You're something else. Beauty is common, and so is charm, but wit? That's a rare trait in itself." He paused, staring deeply at her. "And the challenges you present to men are amusing. You like to withhold the goods from men. Probably because you feel that most men are undeserving of you." He smirked, satisfied with his answers.

She smiled. It was sort of creepy, how he was figuring her out. She liked it but it made her uneasy.

"Now, I want to hear your opinion on me. It's a fair trade, after all."

"Well, you're incredibly intelligent. Probably the most intelligent man I've ever met. You're also handsome, **dashing**, and **charming**, things that most women eat up. But, they wrongfully see you as boastful and arrogant."

"Wrongfully?"

"A man as intelligent and talented as yourself should have **every **right to boast! After all, aren't you supposed to hold your head up high with dignity?"

He just stared at her, scanning her from across the table, examining her. _"__Why is this woman so fascinated by me? No, wait. Why** aren't** women fascinated with me in the first place?"_ It completely eluded him, why so many women would turn him away, why so many **shunned** him. _"Probably because they're too stupid to appreciate **me**,"_ he thought. "_Finally, a woman who's intelligent enough to recognize me for his talents and abilities."_

"... My, you're already finished with your glass? Would you like another?" He asked her.

"No, I'm fine, thank you."

* * *

They finished their dinners, and she wandered inside his house soon after, looking around the giant room.

"Oh! You have a piano?" She asked as she took a seat.

"Yes. I saw a piano in your condominium, do you play?" He asked, taking a seat next to her.

"Occasionally. You see, it was a requirement to learn an instrument, back when I was in that middle school program. It was a part of learning about the musical arts." She said, tapping a happy melody on the keys. She stopped, and asked him, "Do **you** play?"

"I do." He smirked, beginning to play. "You said you took classes on the arts. Can you guess this tune?" He asked, playing a soft melody on the piano. She sat there, contemplating. "Uh oh! Did I get my hopes up too high? Did I stump you?"

"... Beethoven. Symphony number 2." She said, after a little speculation. "This is my first time hearing it on the piano. I've only heard orchestra versions on it. Let me try." She smiled, playing a more dramatic, upbeat tune with the keys.

"Mozart. Symphony number 25."

"Yes!" She said, rapidly sliding on the piano and quitting. "He's my favorite. **Big** fan of his work."

"Then you'll like this." He grinned, taking control of the piano, playing another rapid tune.

"Mozart! Symphony number 5! I'm jealous." She grinned, staring at his piano playing. "I tried to learn it but I always fluked at the transitions between tremolos. Too fast for me to keep up with."

"Practice makes perfect, my dear. Unless, you're me." He grinned at her. She grinned back, amused by his statement.

"May I try something?" She asked, setting her hands on the keys.

"Of course."

She slowly pressed on the keys, and accelerated at a steady pace.

"... Rachmaninoff? Piano concerto 2?" He said, raising a brow at her.

"Yes. Such a pretty tune, wouldn't you say?" She said, slowing down and coming to a stop.

"Indeed. Well, I'm exhausted. Why don't you join me for a seat on the couch?" He proposed, getting up and making way for the couch.

"I don't see why not..." She murmured as she got up and followed.

"Isn't this so much nicer than a simple walk in the park with one of the most vile men in of all of Gotham?" He asked as he took he seat.

"Ah, he cleans up nicely though, and it was actually a lovely walk. I never mentioned anything to you about our date. Did you have me followed?" She smiled, taking a seat next to him.

"... The girls were interested in your little date. And they do love to gossip." He replied, pulling her closer to him. "Tell me about your mom. What was she like?"

"She was a nasty woman. Good for nothing white trash. But, I can thank her for a lot."

"Oh? Like what?" He asked, rubbing her arm.

"Well," she shifted in her seat, "she did raise me, after all. At least in part. And, she was that one who taught me to steal." She said, looking up at him and grinning. "We were a mother/daughter team, especially when I was little. One of us would distract while the other took the goods. She taught the boys to steal too, but she always said I was the best. She'd let me keep some of the spoils, sometimes." She laughed. "Such a great mom."

"You're a good pick-pocket?"

"You could say that..." She said, raising her hand to show him her spoils. "It's not hard to see what you were planning on tonight!" She laughed as she walked the condom along her fingers.

"Best to be prepared for any kind of scenario." He shrugged, putting the condom back in his pocket.

"Well, thank you for the date." She said, getting up and pulling her short dress back down. "This was certainly the most entertaining kidnapping that I've ever gone through."

"You're leaving?" He asked with a bit of insult lingering in his voice.

"I've plans for tomorrow. And I need to buy new groceries!" She chuckled.

"If it's about the condom, I can assure you-"

"It's not. I just need to go."

"... **Don't **you **ever **interrupt me again." He growled, grabbing onto her wrist.

She took a deep breath. She was incredibly angry and flustered. She wanted to give him a piece of her mind, but she knew what would happen if she sassed back at him. He would devalue her, and lose his interest. She's seen it before. It was too early for her to do that. She tried to calm down, and slowly removed her wrist from his grasp.

"Well then..." she said, keeping her voice calm, and trying not to fall apart, "Excuse me, but I have plans."

"What kind of plans?" He inquired.

"Well, I did have shopping to do, but it's very late... I should probably be getting home."

"You could always stay here, and spend the night with me." He grinned.

"**No**, I'm not feeling good." She said sternly, raising her hand to her forehead. "I should really be getting home. Thank you, for the date." She softly smiled as she headed for the door.

He pouted at the sight of her walking out the door. He slumped down in his chair and tilted his hat downwards. _"Women... How irritating."_

* * *

_**A/N: Long chapter, I know! But I felt that the flashback was necessary as it gave a bit more light on what Charlotte's life was like as a teen/young adult and also flashed some light on her relationships and such. Especially since I've kept you guys in the dark about what she's actually like for a really long time. I'll probably be posting more flashbacks, not just from Charlotte, but also from other characters.**_


	23. His Resignation

"Where do you think she is?! It's nearly two in the morning!" Keiko asked as she quickly paced around their living room, growing more and more anxious with each and every passing minute.

"Do you think that maybe she had a psychotic break and got lost? It's getting around that time of year where she starts screwing around with her doses." Erwen replied, calmly sitting on the couch with a cup of hot cocoa.

"Maybe... But I looked around earlier and I didn't see her anywhere! Oh..." She said, taking a seat on the couch and burying her face into her palms. "... I **hate **it when she stays out this late."

She jumped at the sound of the front door unlocking and the knob turning. She jumped over there and slammed the door open.

"And where the hell have **you **been?!" Keiko scowled, glaring at the short woman as she slowly walked inside and took a seat.

"Why, I was out on a date." Charlotte said nonchalantly as she crossed her legs and softly smiled, pulling a plush throw over her.

"How?"

"I was kidnapped." She replied, grimacing down at the table.

"Music Meister?" Erwen laughed.

"No, Edward." Charlotte said.

"**Edward?!**" Keiko roared. "That asshole! Did he even give you a ride home?"

"No. I walked here alone."

"He let you walk home alone during the dead of night?!" She growled more. "I swear, when I get my hands on him..."

"So, how did the date go?" Erwen asked, jumping around in her seat, eager to know of the outcome.

"Horribly." Charlotte responded as she huddled on the couch, burying herself with the throw.

"What? Tell me** everything**."

"It was fine at first. We had a nice candlelit dinner on a balcony and largely made small talk. After we finished, I wandered inside and started playing songs on his piano. He joined shortly after, and we took turns playing songs on the piano. Things were going well after we started cuddling on the couch..." She grinned.

"Oh? When did it go bad?"

"I bragged about what a great pick pocket I was and showed him what I stole from his pocket. He was not pleased!" She laughed.

"And what did you find in his pocket?" Keiko scowled some more.

"... A condom." She chuckled sheepishly.

"I swear to god, I'll **kill **that man!" Keiko yelled, pounding her fist on the coffee table.

"What kind of condom?" Erwen asked, grinning at Charlotte.

"... Magnum." She grinned back, the both of them laughing at Keiko as she fumed with fury. "Anyways, I didn't have plans for sex, so I insisted that I leave, and then he insisted that I stay, and he got mad, I interrupted him, he became furious, and I bolted out the door. Simple, really." She shrugged.

"I'm surprised you didn't have a panic attack. What time did you leave at?" Keiko asked, lowering her voice and trying to keep calm.

"Somewhere around eleven, I think."

"Eleven? You were out wandering aimlessly around town for nearly three hours?"

"It was a really long walk... Although I will admit that I did get a tad distracted at times."

"I was worried sick..." Keiko said, biting onto her lip and averting her eyes.

"Really, I mean, even if it part of it wasn't your fault, you should still apologize." Erwen said, trying to console Keiko.

"It's not like she apologizes anyways." Keiko spat out, her voice bitter with resentment.

"I do apologize!" Charlotte spat back trying to defend her ground.

"Oh yeah?!" Keiko yelled as she took her stand. "How about when you got me locked into solitary confinement?"

"Oh, that was just a one time thing-"

"Or what about that incredibly stupid stunt you pulled at the museum where you blew up the refreshment table without telling me? I could've gotten seriously hurt."

"... Just me reliving the old-"

"And then you run amok the town aimlessly without so much as a call."

"..."

"See! This is exactly what I meant! Just look at yourself, huddling in that seat, shocked at how **wrong** you-"

"I'm sorry."

"What."

"I'm sorry I got you locked into solitary confinement. I'm sorry I blew up that cake. And I'm sorry I was out so late and didn't notify you. I'm sorry."

"... It's okay... You look tired, why don't you go to bed?" Keiko said, dismissing her.

"I will. Goodnight." Charlotte said as she politely excused herself and went up to her room.

"How odd..." Erwen said.

"Yeah, odd..." Keiko agreed.

* * *

He dragged himself out of bed the next morning, threw on some pants, and made his way to his kitchen. He sat down in his favorite seat on his couch after making himself a hot cup of coffee. And it was almost as if he were on cue, because the phone next to him began ringing the second he took his seat.

"Hello?" He asked, sipping from his coffee and setting it down.

"How did your little date go last night, Nigma?" The man asked him.

"It went just fine, Jonathan, I assure you. We actually had a nice time."

"Oh? Was that before or after she stormed out?"

_"How did he know?" _Edward pondered as he slowly took a sip from his beverage. "Even if that were true, how would you know?"

"Oh, don't try to hide it, Edward! You and I both know that **my **date went better. She's a great kisser, you know."

"**What?**"

"Anyways, I've got more **important** things to do than this childish game of charades we've been playing. I'm forfeiting."

"But you can't! We've gotten so far! Unless, you're afraid of defeat and are forfeiting because her obvious choice would have been **me**, not **you**."

"Actually, it's pretty clear she would have picked me. We've known each other longer than you two have. I know so much more, how she thinks, how she ticks. All you know is her background, which I also happen to know. I don't need to justify my leaving this game any longer. Goodbye, Nigma."

He sat there and thought to himself. It was true, he knew about her past, but he didn't really know about **her**. He had no idea what she did for fun, her hobbies, her viewpoints and opinions on matters. Not even why she thinks herself to be so eccentric. It really struck him that he didn't know anything about her, really. She was all a blur to him.

He also felt insulted. Insulted **and **jealous. Insulted that Jonathan would even think that he'd have the slightest chance of winning her instead of him. Jealous how she was closer to Jonathan than him. Jealous how Jonathan knew more. How he kissed her first. How much **closer **he was to winning her than he was. But what really upset him the most, was the notion that Jonathan had. That Jonathan thought he would **never **even come as close to Charlotte as he was. That he was going to lose.

_"Well, I'll just have to prove him wrong, won't I?"_

* * *

_**A/N: I'm so sorry for the really late upload! I've had such a super busy week! I typed this up pretty quickly, so I'll probably come back and fix any errors that I spot, if there are any. **_


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